Bits & Pieces

For All You Geeks...

2007-06-04T13:11:00.000-07:00

Currently listneing to: "They Said Hell's Not Hot" by Marilyn Manson

Here's a webpage that compares sizes of starships, aliens, and even the fucking Deathstar to other scifi properties and real life objects...click the links at the top of the page to see the graph comparisons...
http://www.merzo.net/

In other news, the new Marilyn Manson album is just kind of, well, 'eh'...I can see why they released "If I Was Your Vampire" and "Heart-Shaped Glasses" first as those are the most listenable and memorable...there are some cool parts to other songs, but the sum of the parts do not equal a whole...iduno, maybe it'll grow on me (I doubt it...especially since Pogo is out of the band now...sadness...)...what's with everyone doing all this self-indulgent bullshit these days? That's yet another reason why Scandinavian Folk Metal is THE SHIT because it's just brutal, kick-ass music about Gaulish wars, pagan rituals, and trolls and shite...

My Scattered Return...

2007-05-29T16:37:00.000-07:00

Currently listening to: "If I Was Your Vampire" by Marilyn Manson

So it's been three weeks since the last post...

Since the last writing they still haven't found a replacement for me for my old job, so I've been doing two gigs for the price of one...the silver lining to the mushroom cloud is that I've been collecting a lot of overtime, but the stress has been overwhelming especially at this point in time...not that I've been outwardly complaining, but they keep telling me to 'be patient'...they haven't even started interviewing anyone yet...

I had a whole list of things I compiled to talk about here on ye olde blog, but I can't seem to find it right now...so, um, yeah...so I'll just say this: I started taking anti-depressants... I've been depressed for a really really long time and the death pushed me a little further towards the edge... After I take that tiny little pill I can feel that there is a chemical in me...and I guess it works in a sense because (for now?) it gives me stomach pains and diarrhea...which took my mind off being depressed...just replacing one pain with another...I thought this shit was supposed to make you happy or whatever...

Oh, not that anyone will really care, but the new albums by Nine Inch Nails and Ozzy Osbourne that were released in the past month or so both suck giant balls...they need to just stop...the new Megadeth has great riffs but Mustaine's voice still irks me sometimes and he gets really preachy as this album is obviously inspired by the Iraq war and the current state of the US...but it has a reworked version of "A Tout Le Monde" (with Cristina Scabbia from Lacuna Coil on guest vocals), which is cool but I never know how to feel when bands cover their own songs on future albums...

Smallsac!

My Silent Return...

2007-05-07T00:51:00.000-07:00

Somebody sent me one of these survey things...and I was sitting around doing nothing. so I filled it out...then for some reason I thought I'd post it here since I haven't written anything here in a while...it's below the rest of this message...

Thanks to everyone for all the kind words and support...it was all very much appreciated...sorry I haven't really been in touch...and sorry in advance if you don't get regular updates from me...

In other news, I recently got promoted at ye olde job...it was either take that or jump ship to do TV editorial work at another company...which would have been tempting, but I'll be handling approvals for toys and games now (plus the food/candy/beverage accounts I already managed), which is something I haven't really done much of...I did come in at the tale end of development on the mobile phone games "Brady Bunch Kung Fu" and "Jimmy Neutron's Dimension Dash" at Viacom - but that was mostly testing and QA stuff (my name's in the credits though)...so yeah, I'll take a stab at the toy/game thing for a little while and see what happens...

Here's that survey thing I mentioned:

[A] - AVAILABLE: Yes

[B] - BIRTHDAY: 11/29/81

[C] - CONFUSED: Always

[D] - DRINK YOU LAST HAD: Gatorade - Lemonade flavor

[E] - EASIEST PERSON TO TALK TO: Smallsac - he's a very good listener

[F] - FAVORITE MUSIC GROUP/BAND: I hate questions like this. It's hard to pick just one...so I'll say this: I own more Buckethead CDs than any other artist...but he's also probably put out more albums than anyone else...except maybe Tito Puente

[G] - GUMMY BEARS OR GUMMY WORMS: neither...I don't really like candy...oddly enough, I approve all the food/candy/beverage concepts at my job...

[H] - HOMETOWN: I was born in a hospital somewhere in Hollywood but have lived in Westchester my entire life...

[I] - INSTRUMENT(s): Guitar...too bad I suck at it...

[J] - JUICE: Please.

[K] - KILLED SOMEONE: Not today...

[L] - LONGEST CAR RIDE: Probably 10 hours...

[M] - MILKSHAKE FLAVOR:Don't drink milk...

[N] - NUMBER OF PETS: None currently...

[O] - ONE WISH: Two words: Zombie Apocalypse

[P] - PERSON WHO KISSED YOU LAST: I give Smallsac a kiss goodbye on his forehead every time I leave the house...

[Q] - QUICK RESPONSE: huh?

[R] - REASONS TO SMILE: Good music

[S] - SINGLE: Sure

[T] - TIME YOU WOKE UP: 11AM

[U] - UNDERWEAR: Currently wearing grey boxers with these neat 'Dante's Inferno'-esque devils on them.

[V] - VIOLENT: Not really...I'm saving all my energy up for when the zombie apocalypse hits...

[W] - WORST HABIT: I have a lot of nervous twitches that drive me insane...and I can't leave the house without unplugging things...

[X] - X-rays you've had: Just had a few done last week. But in my life, maybe about 4 other occasions...then there's the two CT scans and the MRI...

[Y] - YOUR FAVORITE ANIMAL: Dead ones...

[Z] - ZODIAC SIGN: Sagittarius

R.I.P., Kiyoshi...

2007-04-11T02:35:00.000-07:00

04-10-07

Today I really felt the pain of true loss for the first time in my life. My father's cousin Kiyoshi passed away. His sister found his body at his home and we're guessing he passed away on Saturday. It's weird because I was just talking to someone about how I'm not close at all with any of my extended family, which is true, but there's always an exception to the rule. Kiyoshi was that exception. He was the one member of my extended family that I kept in contact with on a regular basis and whenever we would get together we would watch really awful movies for hours on end. It's hard to believe I just saw him a week and a half ago and now he's gone.

I was always a weird kid growing up, but it was Kiyoshi who is either the one to thank or the one to blame for me being who I am (and by that I mean a total weirdo)...all it took was showing me "Army of Darkness" on New Year's Day so many many years ago and I got hooked on B-movie cinema and really off the wall stuff. He was a constant inspiration to me and always a being of fascination. When my father came to this country it was Kiyoshi who took him under his wing and showed him around and played all sorts of wonderful classical music for my father. He had such an amazing knowledge of classical music and culture...but at the same time had a thing for sci-fi, fantasy, horror, anything weird... New Year's Day was always interesting in that he could be talking to my father about Verdi's Requiem and all sorts of composers and operas and then turn to me to talk about zombie movies. Kiyoshi was the coolest dude I ever met in my entire life and it trips me out even more that I was related to him. I have nothing but good things to say about him and all my memories of him were happy ones...even when he was miserable he was always in good spirits...I always said to my parents that he was probably the happiest dude I know...

Kiyoshi, all I can say is that I will miss you so fucking much. You were such a great friend to me. There is a deep sadness in my heart and it pains me that I'm going to be living the rest of my life without you in it, but I will always have and cherish the memories. So goodbye, my friend, until we meet again...in the words of Ash, HAIL TO THE KING!

Trivia Quiz for Squiggle #16

2007-04-09T08:58:00.000-07:00

Currently listening to: "Supermonstars (The Anthem of the Phantoms)" by LORDI

Sorry it's been like two months since we've had a TQFS. I've been...busy (read: miserable)...but anyways, here's the latest installment...I'll probably post the answers on Wednesday (if I remember) or after everyone has had a chance to take it...whichever comes first. I'm only going to do one a week for a while...I just don't have the time right now to commit to two a week.

1. How many bathrooms are in the White House?
A. 16
B. 32
C. 37

2. Which was not a name for the Boston Red Sox before they adopted their current monicker?
A. Puritans
B. Pilgrims
C. Pubs

3. What was The Beatles's first #1 song on the U.S. Billboard pop chart?
A. "I Want to Hold Your Hand"
B. "Help!"
C. "A Hard Day's Night"

4. What do the letters "BF" in B.F. Goodrich stand for?
A. Benjamin Franklin
B. Bartholomew Francis
C. Bronson Fittipaldi
D. Buck Futter!

5. Who appears on the $20,000 bill for the play money in the 1960 edition of The Game of Life?
A. G.I. Luvmoney
B. Ransom A. Treasure
C. Art Linklater

6. What was RCA Victor's code name for the 45RPM record?
A. CQD
B. Altair-IV
C. Madame X

7. What year did the first issue of Playboy come out?
A. 1947
B. 1953
C. 1959

8. What year did the first issue of Playgirl come out?
A. 1969
B. 1973
C. 1977

9. What is the real last name of Joseph Stalin?
A. Dzugashvili
B. Valkenvania
C. Zelnicek

10. What does 'Stalin' mean in Russian?
A. Leader
B. Survivor
C. Man of Steel

Yahoo! Personals

2007-04-08T10:02:00.000-07:00

"Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia." ~ Charles Schulz

Today is Easter. Many Christians across this country will be celebrating the world's most famous zombie today. But that's not what I came here to talk about...anyways...

So I log on to my Yahoo! account to check my email and I see a general mail from Yahoo! Personals stating "What are you waiting for?"...so I opened it because I have nothing better to do with my time...and damn, usually these 'find a date' emails feature some 'sexy' girl (if you're a guy... maybe... I suppose... zombies... jelly... grapety?)...but with this one I came face to face with something...different:

CLICK HERE TO SEE IMAGE

...

...

...

...

...

...yeah, seriously...and they gave no explanation for the image only to be known as "Boney Pete"...but there was all the usual lingo: Try it out for free!, Sign up now!, Do you Yahoo!?, etc...I can only guess that they mean I need to get off my lazy, dead ass and go out and get laid...well, if I'm ever looking for a dead guitar player straight out a Dia de Los Muertos festival, I'll have to give Yahoo! Personals a try...which, by the way, just got way cooler by my standards...

The Yaseum: Exhibit One

2007-03-28T07:04:00.000-07:00

Currently listening to: "I am the World" by Mortis

I mark my (not so) triumphant return with a new (occasional) feature that exists because of a request from The Yas. If I see anything interesting in my world or the world you humans dwell in, I'll try to capture an image of it. Get ready to be disappointed...

Exhibit One: "Gloomy in A Minor"

It's only a matter of time before they take this off YouTube...

2007-03-15T14:16:00.000-07:00

"Wherever they burn books they will also, in the end, burn human beings." ~ Heinrich Heine

Anti-Nazi propaganda made by Disney in 1943!

Education for Death

You know it's gonna be a weird day when...

2007-03-14T08:35:00.000-07:00

Currently listening to: "Amber" by Dir en Grey

I suppose you can file this under the 'too much information' category... I had a lot to drink last night...A LOT...to the point where it felt like the world was spinning and if I tried to read something the words were just dancing everywhere... The last thing I remember was listening to the new Buckethead CDs (he just released 14 new discs!) and loading them into my computer so I can sync them to my media player (and no, it's not an iPod)...the next thing I know I wake up a little before 6:00AM...all the CDs that were on my bed are now on the floor, my guitar amp is on, and I'm under my covers naked (although it was late at night at the point I actually remember and at that time I was in my underwear so it's not like I was ripping off all my clothes in some bizarre Bacchic guitar ritual)... Not sure what the Hell happened there...but at the moment I'm extremely tired...and my left hip that I injured many years ago hurts now...usually it only bothers me when it's really cold...hmmm...

Sorry I've been AWOL and all my blogging has just been sporadic 'bits and pieces' of things...I've got catching up to do with all of you and I also owe you guys some trivia questions...I'll try to get to that soon...when I'm sober and not busy...I've had a lot of work-related things to do lately so I haven't been blogging during the day and at home I've either been doing research for upcoming projects or getting drunk...and for some reason my computer craps out when I try to load Blogger which is yet another hindrance to blogging during the evening...

It's gonna be a weird day...

"YOU CAN VASELINE!!!"

2007-03-09T09:12:00.000-08:00

"You can Vaseline and you can Vaseline and YOU CAN VASELINE!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" ~ Tyra Banks

Yup, Tyra's nuts...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZdHpYMR4ljY

In Support of Satan, I guess...

2007-03-09T08:54:00.000-08:00

"Darkness has its attraction which anyone can feel and only hypocrites deny. It's time to remove the blindfold of hypocrisy. Be true to yourself, Hail Satan." ~ Stian Thoresen

From IMDb.com today:
Pope Unhappy About Dylan Concert
Pope Benedict XVI has criticized his late predecessor Pope John Paul II's decision to share the stage with American rocker Bob Dylan. The current pontiff, who took over as head of the Roman Catholic Church following John Paul II's death in 2005, believes rock music is the work of Satan and cancelled the annual Christmas pop concert at The Vatican last year. Benedict XVI was one of John Paul II's closest aides during his time as Pope and was concerned when John Paul II appeared on the same platform as Dylan during a 1997 concert in Bologna, Italy. Dylan sang "Knockin' On Heaven's Door," "A Hard Rain's A-Gonna Fall" and "Forever Young" at the concert. In Benedict XVI's new book "John Paul II, My Beloved Predecessor," the current Pope writes, "There was a reason to be skeptical and I was. Indeed in a certain sense I still am today. I have doubts to this day whether it was right to let this kind of so-called prophet take the stage (in front of John Paul II)."

This disgusts me...

2007-03-02T09:07:00.000-08:00

"End discrimination. Hate everybody." ~ Elle Eden

This'll be short because I have a lot to do today...for the past few days I've been checking Ticketmaster to see if LORDI added an a L.A. date to the shows they'll be playing in the next few months and the first thing I see when logging on to the TM main page is an auction for Iggy Pop & the Stooges tickets at The Wiltern...an AUCTION!..and the MINIMUM bid for the Pit and Loge tickets you can get is $20 more than a full price ticket...all less-spectacular seats are fully available through regular means... It's not even for charity or anything like that...Ticketmaster has just found a new way of milking more money out of people. It's only a matter of time before they reserve all the good seats/areas at concerts for auctions and make only the shitty, back-of-the-bus seats available normally...

Sorry I haven't been about the Blogger world that much lately, been really busy...I'll try to catch up on all your blogs and comment and such real soon!

OK, back to work...

I'm 46...

2007-02-27T11:27:00.000-08:00

"Things are not as bad as they seem. They are worse." ~ Bill Press

Trivia should be up a little later...sorry I haven't been on top of that...for some reason I'm not able to log on to Blogger from my computer at home, so I'm only able to blog at work... I guess I could type up all the shite when I'm at home, but my daily consumption of alcohol gets in the way of that...

At the moment it's easier for me to just repost this test that my mom forwarded me. I'm ashamed to be putting this up because the test came from Dr. Phil...apparently he scored 55, Oprah scored 38. I scored a 46...so I'm somewhere between Dr. Phil and Oprah...um ,eww...but seriously, when you read the range that 46 falls under, you will find that it is complete horseshit when it relates to me...

Your answers should pertain to who you are now, not who you were in the past. Have a pen and paper ready to keep track of what letters you answered for each question...here's a thingie at the end where each letter holds a certain numerical value... It's only ten questions long.

1. When do you feel your best?
a) in the morning
b) during the afternoon &and early evening
c) late at night

2 . You usually walk...
a) fairly fast, with long steps
b) fairly fast, with little steps
c) less fast head up, looking the world in the face
d) less fast, head down
e) very slowly

3. When talking to people you...
a) stand with your arms folded
b) have your hands clasped
c) have one or both your hands on your hips
d) touch or push the person to whom you are talking
e) play with your ear, touch your chin, or smooth your hair

4. When relaxing, you sit with...
a) your knees bent with your legs neatly side by side
b) your legs crossed
c) your legs stretched out or straight
d) one leg curled under you

5. When something really amuses you, you react with...
a) big appreciated laugh
b) a laugh, but not a loud one
c) a quiet chuckle
d) a sheepish smile

6. When you go to a party or social gathering you...
a) make a loud entrance so everyone notices you
b) make a quiet entrance, looking around for someone you know
c) make the quietest entrance, trying to stay unnoticed

7. You're working very hard, concentrating hard, and you're interrupted...
a) welcome the break
b) feel extremely irritated
c) vary between these two extremes

8. Which of the following colors do you like most?
a) Red or orange
b) black
c) yellow or light blue
d) green
e) dark blue or purple
f) white
g) brown or gray

9. When you are in bed at night, in those last few moments before going to sleep you are...
a) stretched out on your back
b) stretched out face down on your stomach
c) on your side, slightly curled
d) with your head on one arm
e) with your head under the covers

10. You often dream that you are...
a) falling
b) fighting or struggling
c) searching for something or somebody
d) flying or floating
e) you usually have dreamless sleep
f) your dreams are always pleasant

POINTS:
1. (a) 2 (b) 4 (c) 6
2. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 7 (d) 2 (e) 1
3. (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 5 (d) 7 (e) 6
4. (a) 4 (b) 6 (c) 2 (d) 1
5. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 2
6. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 2
7 (a) 6 (b) 2 (c) 4
8. (a) 6 (b) 7 (c) 5 (d) 4 (e) 3 (f) 2 (g) 1
9. (a) 7 (b) 6 (c) 4 (d) 2 (e) 1
10. (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 6 (f) 1
Now add up the total number of points.

OVER 60 POINTS: Others see you as someone they should "handle with care." You're seen as vain, self-centered, and who is extremely dominant. Others may admire you, wishing they could be more like you, but don't always trust you, hesitating to become too deeply involved with you.

51 TO 60 POINTS : Others see you as an exciting, highly volatile, rather impulsive personality; a natural leader, who's quick to make decisions, though not always the right ones. They see you as bold and adventuresome, someone who will try anything once; someone who takes chances and enjoys an adventure. They enjoy being in your company because of the excitement you radiate.

41 TO 50 POINTS : Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting; someone who's constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well-balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding; someone who'll always cheer them up and help them out.

31 TO 40 POINTS : Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful & practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest. Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who's extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expect the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over if that trust is ever broken.

21 TO 30 POINTS: Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It would really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment, expecting you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then, usually decide against it. They think this reaction is caused partly by your careful nature.

UNDER 21 POINTS : People think you are shy, nervous, and indecisive, someone who needs looking after, who always wants someone else to make the decisions & who doesn't want to get involved with anyone or anything! They see you as a worrier who always sees problems that don't exist. Some people think you're boring. Only those who know you well know that you aren't.

Follow-up on Yesterday

2007-02-22T08:02:00.000-08:00

"Life is one long process of getting tired." ~ Samuel Butler

Yesterday was a long day that included a long and shitty drive home...they're setting up for the Oscars in Hollywood and unless I took the fuck-all way down and went through the Downtown L.A. area (the 5 to the 110 to get to the 10 to the 405), which would've been an entirely different nightmare, I had no choice but to either pass through Hollywood or get on the 101 which gets fucked because of Hollywood traffic. So I endured a 1 hour, 40 minute drive home that began with me going about half a mile in 30 minutes. It's gonna be fucked again today and fucked again tomorrow...and there's a concert I'm going to at the Avalon on Saturday and things will be fucked then, too...FUCK!

But the silver lining in this mushroom cloud (at least in regards to yesterday) is that when I got home, what did my parents make for dinner??? Kielbasa and sauerkraut!!! I hadn't talked to them all day and they didn't know about my whole Oktoberfest-music-fueled morning, so it was purely coincidence. So I grabbed my bottle of whiskey, got drunk as fuck, and chowed down. There's plenty leftover, too, so at least I have something to look forward to and the end what will probably be a crap day today...this is going to sound wrong, and I know this, but I love sausage! Hehehe...

Oktoberfest!!! ... in February

2007-02-21T08:32:00.000-08:00

"If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic." ~ Author Unknown

I've been listening to this CD all morning...ever since I got in to work at 7:30AM...

I gotta find a place that serves kielbasa for lunch...and I can't wait to get home so I can drink...

TQFS #15 Answers

2007-02-20T09:19:00.000-08:00

"A cynic is a person searching for an honest man, with a stolen lantern." ~ Edgar A. Shoaff

*UPDATE*: I forgot to say who got the highest score when I posted these answers earlier...that would be Yasamin with 5 out of 10 correct...!

1. According to recent research, about how many couples per year take out marriage licenses but fail to use them?
A. 9,000

2. On the island of Trobriand what would be considered a disgrace for a man to do with a woman unless they were married?
C. Take her out to dinner
The ocean one was more fun, but apparently to share a meal with an unmarried woman would disgrace her.

3. What is not a common item rented by brides for their weddings in Copenhagen, Denmark?
A. A wig with eight foot tresses
Shite, I think I want one of these if I get married (god forbid)...

4. How many hours did the longest kiss listed in the Guinness Book of World Records last?
C. 417
Did they sleep?

5. The German language contains how many words that refer to the act of kissing?
A. 30
There is even a word, Nachkuss, for all the kisses that haven't yet been named...egad...

6. How many female victims is the Countess Erzebet Bathory (the world’s most famous female serial killer) rumored to have killed in her lifetime?
B. 650

7. What was the name of John Wayne Gacy’s (rapist and murderer of 33 boys and young men) clown persona he dressed up as for children’s birthday parties?
A. Pogo

8. What was John Wayne Gacy’s job when he moved from Illinois to Iowa?
B. Manager of a Kentucky Fried Chicken
I'm so glad I've never been to Iowa and that I'm too young to have gone to that KFC... Here's a keen KFC-related quote which I've probably shared before but here it is again: "MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken!" ~ Lewis Black

9. The song “Satan’s Barbeque” by Swedish metal band Terror is about a barbeque at Satan’s house with Jeffrey Dahmer, Ted Bundy, and who?
A. George Foreman

10. Which actor does the narration for both the original Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974) and the year 2000 remake?
B. John Larroquette

Trivia Quiz for Squiggle #XV: "Say No to VD" Edition

2007-02-14T13:59:00.000-08:00

"Love is like a flower; even the most beautiful kind dies." ~ Dietrich "Till" Lindemann

OK, I must thank the Almighty HDD for the subtitle to today's quiz installment...which happens to be the 15th TQFS (and 15 is the number of The Devil in the tarot)...this also happens to be my 275th Blogger post...

For today's batch of 10 questions, in 'honor' of VD, I've included five related to love/relationships/marriage and five related to serial killers/death/etc...have fun and good luck!

1. According to recent research, about how many couples per year take out marriage licenses but fail to use them?
A. 9,000
B. 13,000
C. 27,000

2. On the island of Trobriand what would be considered a disgrace for a man to do with a woman unless they were married?
A. Bite off her eyelashes
B. Throw her into the ocean
C. Take her out to dinner

3. What is a common item rented by brides for their weddings in Copenhagen, Denmark?
A. A wig with eight foot tresses
B. A wedding veil with the Danish coat of arms
C. Wooden slippers

4. How many hours did the longest kiss listed in the Guinness Book of World Records last?
A. 137
B. 216
C. 417

5. The German language contains how many words that refer to the act of kissing?
A. 30
B. 52
C. 69

6. How many female victims is the Countess Erzebet Bathory (the world’s most famous female serial killer) rumored to have killed in her lifetime?
A. 360
B. 650
C. 1600

7. What was the name of John Wayne Gacy’s (rapist and murderer of 33 boys and young men) clown persona he dressed up as for children’s birthday parties?
A. Pogo
B. Doink
C. Shaggy

8. What was John Wayne Gacy’s job when he moved from Illinois to Iowa?
A. Florist/salesperson at a roadside flower stand
B. Manager of a Kentucky Fried Chicken
C. Portrait painter

9. The song “Satan’s Barbeque” by Swedish metal band Terror is about a barbeque at Satan’s house with Jeffrey Dahmer, Ted Bundy, and who?
A. George Foreman
B. George W. Bush
C. George Hamilton

10. Which actor does the narration for both the original Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974) and the year 2000 remake?
A. James Earl Jones
B. John Larroquette
C. Christopher Lee

Don't get VD onVD...!

2007-02-14T08:17:00.000-08:00

"Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion." ~ Miguel de Unamuno

...the headline's just a little word of advice I thought I'd throw out there for ya...

Anyways, I don't believe in this bullshit Hallmark/See's candy/every cocksucking jewelry store-profiting 'whore'iday, but this VGCats.com VD edition is fucking funny, for all you video game-inclined folks...it features a cartoon version of Shigeru Miyamoto and...Pants Man!!! Click on the image to make it larger... The Kirby valentine is my favorite...

TQFS #14 Answers

2007-02-13T14:40:00.000-08:00

"If wasn't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all..." ~ me

OK, doesn't look like anyone else is going to take the quiz, so here's the answers to TQFS #14...although I will admit that this one wasn't my most favorite quiz out of all the ones I've done so far... mg got the highest score with 4 out of 10...

1. What is the best-selling brand of cookie in the world?
A. Oreo
Over 6 billion sold per year!

2. What nationality eats more chocolate per capita from the following groups?
A. Irish
Yeah, wha???

3. On average, what percentage of homemade dinners in the U.S. include vegetables?
B. 43%
Kinda sad, eh?

4. On average, rice is the staple food for how much of the world’s population?
B. More than one half
I honestly thought it would be more than that...

5. Since Hindus don’t eat beef, the McDonald’s in New Delhi makes its burgers with what?
C. Mutton
Mmm...sheep burger...

6. Sliced bread was introduced under the Wonder Bread label in what year?
B. 1930

7. What is the dye used to stamp the grade on meat made from?
B. Grape skins

8. What is the most widely eaten fish in the world?
C. Herring
Tempted was I to write in 'fish taco' as one of the possible answers, but I resisted...why? I do not know...

9. The Pillsbury Bake-Off has been held every year since:
B. 1948

10. How many varieties of watermelon are grown worldwide?
C. Over 1,200
I know...1200??? I only knew of 2...regular watermelon and then those weird square ones the Japanese produce...

Decisions...

2007-02-12T12:13:00.000-08:00

"When angry, count four; when very angry, swear." ~ Mark Twain, Pudd'nhead Wilson

Um, new trivia two posts below this one...

This one's for Yasamin...dude, I totally sympathize with the shit storm that has rained down on you. While I can't do anything at all to help the situation, I'm hoping these pictures will put a smile on your face if for only a second...this little guy always warms my black and wilted stump of a heart whenever I'm down:

"decisions..."

"Decisions..."

"DECISIONS!!!"

Hymen placenta?

2007-02-12T10:35:00.000-08:00

"Decaffeinated coffee is the devil's blend." ~ Author Unknown

NEW TRIVIA BELOW THIS POST!!!

I wasn't even thinking about posting this news, especially because I don't want to upset HDD seeing as how I just got back into her good graces (it's evil clown-related)...but the fact that there is a coffee out there called himan plu cento made me want to share the article and I had this thought as I read it [begin narration transmission from Scott's noggin]:

"Jeezy creezy, I remember growing up in a world where there was just coffee...regular and decaf...no fancy shit...kinda like how there were only two types of M&Ms back in the day...plain and peanut...now there's like 20...including the recently introduced dark chocolate M&Ms that are stamped 'm dark'...what has this world come to? Kids have too many choices these days...greedy little shits...

[end transmission]

Yup, that's what goes on in my brain...especially the 'greedy little shits' part...

Oh yeah, so you're probably wondering what the aformentioned news is ACTUALLY about...well, it's about how McDonald's coffee is apparently better than Starbucks coffee...and they happen to mention this mysterious 'himan plu cento' (hymen placenta!) drink...

Starbucks Wars

Trivia Quiz for Squiggle #14

2007-02-12T08:21:00.000-08:00

"High-tech tomatoes. Mysterious milk. Supersquash. Are we supposed to eat this stuff? Or is it going to eat us?" ~ Annita Manning

As Mr. Lordi would say, the raging hounds return! Here's the long-awaited trivia installment...hopefully we'll be back on a (semi) regular schedule from here on out...

1. What is the best-selling brand of cookie in the world?
A. Oreo
B. Chips Ahoy
C. Mother’s

2. What nationality eats more chocolate per capita from the following groups?
A. Irish
B. Swedish
C. American…ish

3. On average, what percentage of homemade dinners in the U.S. include vegetables?
A. 27%
B. 43%
C. 65%

4. On average, rice is the staple food for how much of the world’s population?
A. About one third
B. More than one half
C. About three fourths

5. Since Hindus don’t eat beef, the McDonald’s in New Delhi makes its burgers with what?
A. Ox
B. Turkey
C. Mutton

6. Sliced bread was introduced under the Wonder Bread label in what year?
A. 1890
B. 1930
C. 1950

7. What is the dye used to stamp the grade on meat made from?
A. Tree sap and food coloring
B. Grape skins
C. Squid ink

8. What is the most widely eaten fish in the world?
A. Salmon
B. Trout
C. Herring

9. The Pillsbury Bake-Off has been held every year since:
A. 1915
B. 1948
C. 1962

10. How many varieties of watermelon are grown worldwide?
A. About 200
B. Slightly less than 600
C. Over 1,200

Stuff what?!?!?

2007-02-09T07:23:00.000-08:00

"Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love." ~ Albert Einstein

As I was driving home yesterday I saw a license plate that read "STUFF♥R"...my first reaction was "Stuff harder?...awfully bold for a license plate..." Then I get a look at the person driving and it's a lady who's in her early to mid 50's...looks like maybe a school teacher...who goes to church...and all that... So now I'm getting all these images of her...getting stuffed...harder...um, eww...but at the same time I was like "Well, right on...you have just as much of a right ot be freaky as the rest of us..." Then about half a mile down the road I realized it was probably "Stuff lover"...yeah, I'm slow...and hey, who doesn't love stuff?

Yeah, I own nature CDs...

2007-02-08T08:57:00.000-08:00

"Poverty, Frost, Famine, Rain, Disease, are the beadles and guardsmen that hold us to Common Sense." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

I don't watch "Lost" but I heard a commercial for it on 95.5 KLOS and it started out with the first few seconds of this rain forest CD I own that I bought back when I was in high school. That was when I was writing music more and would throw in random samples/ambience from nature CDs (I had an Okeefenokee Swamp CD that was just awesome), sound effects I recorded, that kinda shite... When I heard the "Lost" commercial it was on the CD radio thingie in my bathroom and I heard it from my bedroom...at first I thought (despite that I knew I was listening to KLOS) I had put the CD in and the ghosts that haunt my house flipped the CD switch...and pressed play...but I also thought it was weird because I know I haven't listened to that CD for years...but I still remember exactly how it started and when the pan flutes and harps kick in and shit... But then the commercial part of it started...they only played enough of the Rain Forest CD before the pan flutes began...and basically just repeated that sample over and over again...and ended on it...weird...

Top 10 Creepiest Fast Food Mascots

2007-02-07T11:35:00.000-08:00

"We think fast food is equivalent to pornography, nutritionally speaking." ~ Steve Elbert

This one's for the Diva...

Top Ten Creepiest Fast Food Mascots
http://www.fanpop.com/spots/legendary-ads/soapbox/56

Oh yeah, and sorry this blog's been lacking in the trivia department...there might even be a new installment today...if not, tomorrow...

OK, I get it...

2007-02-07T07:28:00.000-08:00

"Bad is never good until worse happens." ~ Danish Proverb

Y'know, when I was much younger I always wondered why my Dad had like 6 recordings of the same damn piece of classical music. It made no sense to me... But I just previewed about 5 different recordings in my quest to find a good recording of "Carmina Burana"...I put my favorite track to the test ("Fortune plango vulnera ")...on one the choir ennunciated the words better and on another the drums were just killer but on both everything would get drowned out at the climax...another sounded great but they rushed through the climax in what can only describe as the musical equivalent of a randy dog humping someone's leg... I settled on the Deutsche Grammophon release done by the Berlin Orchestra because it sounded great and had the perfect pacing. I may end up picking up one or two of the other recordings because there were parts of those that I liked...but the Berlin one was the superior version in my opinion. I remember going through a similar problem some years back when I was looking for a version of "Peer Gynt" where "In the Hall of the Mountain King" had a choir (most of the recordings I came across didn't, to my surprise...because it sounds so bad-ass with the choir)...but in that case I didn't really pay attention to the way the music was orchestrated or analyze the resonance of the timpani or think about how this part was faster in that recording to this recording or whatever...I just wanted to hear voices. I listen to a lot of metal and when I go to see the bands I like play live, often they'll change up parts here and there which can evoke a different emotion and feel from the song...so it's odd that I never really thought of classical in that way. When I really sat and analyzed and heard the way different parts were being played on "Fortune plango vulnera ," faster, slower, one instrument being more prominent at this part or the other, it really changed the entire mood of the piece. Not that I ever knocked my Dad for buying half a dozen different recordings of the same thing...I just never understood...but yeah, after a quarter of a century of existence on this filthy rock we call Earth, I get it...buy away, Dad...

Well, isn't that special?

2007-02-07T07:07:00.000-08:00

"If you're going through hell, keep going." ~ Winston Churchill

An excavation in Italy discovered two skeletions who died hugging each other...apparently that's supposed to be moving or heartfelt or something... Now, the information I learned in college for my major came from a lot of archaeological study (not that I ever dug up anything personally) so it may be weird for me to say this, but when you think about it, if these two people did indeed die in a loving embrace it's kinda fucked up that someone now is disturbing that 'eternal embrace'...you know they're just going to dig up the bodies (it's not like they'd re-bury them out of respect) and put them in a museum somewhere...which is where we'll all be in a thousand years...well, unless some psychopath eats your flesh and dissolves your bones in a vat of acid in his/her basement...

The Eternal Embrace
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070206/sc_nm/italy_embrace_dc

Japanese Tongue Twister...

2007-02-05T09:26:00.000-08:00

"Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional." ~ M. Kathleen Casey

...and nut cracker...

I tried to embed this link, but long story short it didn't work, so yeah...
Say this tongue twister, or else

Is It Any Wonder?

2007-02-05T01:01:00.000-08:00

"If you break your neck, if you have nothing to eat, if your house is on fire, then you got a problem. Everything else is inconvenience." ~ Robert Fulghum

My sister just returned Keane's second album ("Under the Iron Sea") to me after having it for, well, a long time (and it was only released last year!)...and before I go any further, yes, I listen to Keane. I actually can identify with a lot of the song lyrics because let's face it, Tom Chaplin must've had his heart ripped out by someone before/whislt writing those songs...but that's not why I listen to this band. I really like their combination of vox, percussion, and keyboards...the sound is just right and actually more pure on their first album than their second... While getting reacquainted with #2, I was reminded of these lines that express something I've felt for a long time:

"Sometimes I get the feeling that I'm
Stranded in the wrong time
Where love is just a lyric in a children's rhyme, a soundbite"
from "Is It Any Wonder?"

Just before you think I'm getting totally sappy, I'll say this: I dig the era I'm living in as far as technology, music, zombie movies, etc...but I always thought it'd be keen to be born a couple thousand years ago when you could get away with almost anything and there was no forensic science CSI shite to catch people...MWUAHAHAHAHAHA!!! And as much as I would like to believe in that thing you humans call love, maybe it really is just is a lyric...that 'nice' thing you say to make people feel good and to sell records, movies, and books... So on that note, here's the other cool line I heard from another CD my sister returned to me:

"The Devil's hungry and he's eating light!!!"
from "Hell's on Fire" on Metal Skool's "Hole Patrol"

I am a Mean Bastard...

2007-02-02T09:54:00.000-08:00

"Abandon all hope, ye who enter here." ~ Dante Alighieri

I really want to send one of these to HDD...yes, I am MEAN...anyone know the Diva's address??? Hehehe...

Every morning I...

2007-02-02T07:43:00.000-08:00

"Life after death is as improbable as sex after marriage." ~ Mrs. White

...listen to this song on my media player as I walk into work:

Fuck The Pain Away
by Peaches
album: The Teaches Of Peaches (2002)

Sucking on my titties like you wanted me
Calling me, all the time like Blondie
Check out my chrissy behind
It's fine all of the time
Like sex on the beaches
What else is in the teaches of peaches? Huh? What?

Sucking' on my titties like you wanted me
Calling me, all the time like Blondie
Check out my chrissy behind
It's fine all of the time
What else is in the teaches of peaches?
Like sex on the beaches, Huh? What?

Huh? Right. What? Uhh
Huh? What? Right. Uhh
Huh? What? Right. Uhh
Huh? What? Right. Uhh

SIS IUD, stay in school ‘cause it's the best
IUD SIS, stay in school ‘cause it's the best
IUD SIS, stay in school ‘cause it's the best
IUD SIS, stay in school ‘cause it's the best

Sucking' on my titties like you wanted me
Calling me, all the time like Blondie
Check out my chrissy behind
It's fine all of the time
Like sex on the beaches
What else is in the teaches of peaches? Huh? What?

Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.
Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.
Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.
Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.
Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.
Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.
Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.
Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.

Huh? What? Right. Uhh
Huh? What? Right. Uhh
What else in the teaches of peaches?
Like sex on the beaches
Huh? What? Right. Uhh

Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.
Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.
Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.
Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.

Blooggle...!

2007-01-31T08:31:00.000-08:00

"I never think of the future - it comes soon enough." ~ Albert Einstein

So when I logged in to Blogger yesterday to post the TQFS #13 answers, I was basically forced to create a New Blogger/Google account thingie...stuffy... I don't like the new format...and I noticed that Yasamin's comments on the blog are now from "Anonymous"... I held out as long as I could and never wanted to give into the Blogger Beta which is now the New SHIT...

"Babble babble bitch bitch
Rebel rebel party party
Sex sex sex and don't forget the violence

Blah blah blah
Got your lovey-dovey sad and lonely
Stick your stupid slogan in
And everybody sing along

Everything has been said before
Nothing left to say anymore
When it's all the same you can ask for it by name...

Are you motherfucker's ready for the new shit?
Stand up and admit tomorrow's never coming
This is the new shit
Stand up and admit..."
~ Marilyn Manson, "This is the New Shit"

Blogger blows...

TQFS #13 Answers

2007-01-30T16:59:00.000-08:00

"When a cow laughs, does milk come out her nose?" ~ Author Unknown

Doug got the high score of this installment with 8 out of 10 correct...! Many thanks to mg (6 out of 10) and Yasamin (4 out of 10) for also playing...

1. The pulsating engine sound of the Star Destroyer is a manipulated recording of a:
A. Broken air conditioner

2. According to an interview with George Lucas, originally Luke was:
A. A girl
Re: Answer B (Green alien) - this is what Han Solo was originally supposed to be...

3. Originally, Luke Skywalker’s last name was:
C. Starkiller
I made up the name "Cloudhopper" and "Starscreamer" was a nod to Slipknot's DJ who jockeys on the side as DJ Starscream

4. “Vader” is Dutch for:
A. Father
Hmmm...a spoiler from the very beginning...right in front of our eyes!

5. Which of the three original Star Wars films had the longest production shoot?
B. Episode V
Principal photography lasted over 170 days...

6. Determined to keep the ending to “The Empire Strikes Back” a secret, what line did George Lucas have Darth Vader say to Luke on set instead of “I am your father”?
A. “Obi-Wan killed your father”

7. The Huttese language spoken by Jabba the Hut was inspired by:
B. The Incan language Quechua
...and then it was enhanced electronically. Lando's little co-pilot buddy's language was based on the Kenyan language of Haya

8. “Star Wars Episode VI: The Return of the Jedi” was filmed under what working title to protect the secrecy of the production and keep costs down?
A. Teddy Bear’s Picnic
B. Blue Harvest
C. Planet Terror
Another reason for filming under the guise of the non-descript horror movie title, "Blue Harvest" was (partly to put off any snoopers and also) because the production found that if they mentioned they were working on the next Star Wars film, suppliers would automatically ramp up their prices, assuming that money was no object for Lucasfilm. I threw in the title "Teddy Bear's Picnic" because after all the Phantom Menaces, Siths, Empire Striking Back, and Jedis Returning, it all ends with a fucking teddy bear's picnic...

9. The slithery noises made when Jabba the Hutt moves were created by the sound man:
A. Running his hands through a cheese casserole

10. Qui-Gon Jinn's communicator is actually a redecorated what?
A. Sensor Excel Razor for Women

TQFS #13: The Return of the Squigi

2007-01-29T14:54:00.000-08:00

"I prefer to think that God is not dead, just drunk." ~ John Marcellus Huston

How appropriate that the 13th installment of the quiz marks it's (not-so-triumphant) return. To make it somewhat easy (or somewhat more fun...or somewhat whatever) this whole quiz is all Star Wars-related trivia...

1. The pulsating engine sound of the Star Destroyer is a manipulated recording of a:
A. Broken air conditioner
B. Car timing belt
C. Electric chainsaw

2. According to an interview with George Lucas, originally Luke was:
A. A girl
B. An green alien with gills and no nose
C. A wookie

3. Originally, Luke Skywalker’s last name was:
A. Starscreamer
B. Cloudhopper
C. Starkiller

4. “Vader” is Dutch for:
A. Father
B. Betrayer
C. Evil

5. Which of the three original Star Wars films had the longest production shoot?
A. Episode IV
B. Episode V
C. Episode VI

6. Determined to keep the ending to “The Empire Strikes Back” a secret, what line did George Lucas have Darth Vader say to Luke on set instead of “I am your father”?
A. “Obi-Wan killed your father”
B. “Welcome to the afterlife”
C. “What does it matter?”

7. The Huttese language spoken by Jabba the Hut was inspired by:
A. The Mandarin Chinese dialect
B. The Incan language Quechua
C. The Kenyan language of Haya

8. “Star Wars Episode VI: The Return of the Jedi” was filmed under what working title to protect the secrecy of the production and keep costs down?
A. Teddy Bear’s Picnic
B. Blue Harvest
C. Planet Terror

9. The slithery noises made when Jabba the Hutt moves were created by the sound man:
A. Running his hands through a cheese casserole
B. Stepping in a bucket full of pig intestines
C. Swishing Jell-O between his teeth

10. Qui-Gon Jinn's communicator is actually a redecorated what?
A. Sensor Excel Razor for Women
B. Toy Star Trek communicator
C. P-Touch brand Labelmaker

You Park Like an Asshole

2007-01-29T09:24:00.000-08:00

"I have my own little world, but it's okay - they know me here." ~ Author Unknown

Sent to me by a coworker... I hope to have trivia up again today!...if not, tomorrow!

http://www.youparklikeanasshole.com/

Gnomesville Massacre

2007-01-27T10:35:00.000-08:00

"Who overcomes by force hath overcome but half his foe." ~ John Milton

Just a weird little story I thought I'd share...and I swear I DIDN'T DO IT!...someone else beat me to the punch:

Gnome, gnome on derange

Dir en Grey "Obscure"

2007-01-26T23:45:00.000-08:00

"There is no I in TEAM but there is so a fucking ME!" ~ Stephen Gilchrist Glover

It's a fucking blog-o-rama on Bits & Pieces tonight (see posts below)! Here's a clip from Dir en Grey, which is a Japanese metal band that sounds like the bastard child resulting from an orgy with old-school Korn, modern metal, Marilyn Manson, and Rammstein. I first heard of this band when Jonathan Davis (from Korn) chose DeG to open the most recent Family Values tour...which led me to not rush out and check them out because Jon Davis's taste in music and musical direction has been mostly questionable these days...but I dig this band! I'm not really a fan of modern metal at all, but these guys are fucking WEIRD and it's nice to see Japs rockin' out as it gives me hope...hehehe...and for those who don't know, I'm half-Japanese which gives me every right to say Jap (or so I'm saying)...so HA...! And this video is awesome...when I watch it, I feel it's as if all the really weird shite in my brain was bukkake'd onto celluloid (then eaten and shat out)...ugghh...but at the same time I only wish I could come up with something as good...oh, and the unrated version of the video is WAY better (look it up on YouTube if interested)...

Speak of the Devil...

2007-01-26T23:12:00.000-08:00

"Boredom slays more of existence than war..." ~ Norman Mailer

...and he comes running for a cookie...

...OK, that made no sense, but fuck it...

So I still feel like shit (see post below this one), but as I was doing my random internetting, the Yahoo home page at this particular point in time features the Yahoo! Answers question of the, uh, moment...and it has to deal with dreams (yup, speak of the devil!...and again, see post below this one)...here's the question that was posted by some random individual (everything is posted, unedited, word for word):

What do Dreams Mean?
In the past couple of nights I had these really weird deams. I mean really weird and upsetting. I just need to know If any of you out there believe as I do that dreams mean something. If so....then I would love to find someone to help me decipher the dreams I have had in the past couple of night.

Here's the response I contributed to the cause (at the time of my posting I was the 849th response or some shite like that):
I think if someone really knew the answer to this question they'd be a very rich individual... Perhaps everyone's 'reasons' for why they dream what they dream are different. Personally, I've always felt the majority of my dreams are like my brain doing spring cleaning...bringing up some of the most random moments, people, or whatever from my past and throwing them all together somehow. They never have anything to do with how I was feeling or what I was watching/listening to before going to sleep. Maybe it all has some deep, psychological meaning...or maybe it's just one's brain kinda having a fart... I guess you have to step back and look at what's going on in your life and what happened in your past that could possibly contribute to whatever dreams you are having if you want to find some meaning to it all...it's your dream so really only you know the answer. A psychologist, dream analyst, random schmo on the internet can give all the opinions they want on what it all means, but we all don't know you at all and it's possible you may be exaggerating the truth (which would hinder a proper 'analysis') or may not be comfortable giving all the details of your life (and understandably so) to help us understand why you're dreaming what you're dreaming, so really it all falls back on you.

So that's just how I feel. By no means am I saying I'm right...I actually think it would be fucking pompous for anyone to come out and say they have THE right answer... So as I was scanning through the hundreds of other posts (with a lot of Jung this, Freud that), I came across these other two posts that I found particularly interesting. Here's one from "Sheila A":
Dreams are your brain's way, of doing, --house keeping. In many ways, depending on the stress level at the time, the time of day or night, and what is occuring in your life during those times, your brain can only absorb so much. It takes in what is happening, but like a file cabinet, no matter what time of day/nite, when it's full, it's just,-full. No matter what you continue to stuff inside beyond it's capacity. And just like you, when you have time to climb in and take out what is not needed, and replace the empty space with what you have over time stuffed inside, your brain does the same thing, when you sleep. That's not to say that what you dream doesn't mean anything because dreams do matter. Ask yourself what you have been going thru, avoiding, holding back on, or releasing yourself to as of late. It's not rocket science, the brain is a miraculous part of your body, it's the secret chamber, that only you can unlock with total honesty, compassion and submission to what maybe inside. Like chasing the boggy-man back. Get back into the face of what you are afraid of. Rather than having some hypnotic suggestion posed to you under hypnosis, if you seek, you will find. If you don't you will be haunted until you deal with what you are denying, avoiding, or hiding from, no matter if it's emotional pain, confrontation, admition, etc. If you can stand to look in the mirror every day before work you can do this. One last note: not all consequences are bad. They are both, good and bad. If you are in denial or hiding from feelings that you are afraid to admit feel good, you are still hiding. Point is, is to keep your cards out on the table where you can see what you are doing, so you can play fair with not only others, but mostly yourself. You dig kiddo?

I dig, "Sheila A"! Now here's one from "Biblical View":
I canot guarentee anything unless the Lord shows me but God has given me tha gift of interpeting dreams and I would be glad to help if I can. The bible realy is a God revelaing himself in dreams and the Lord uses them to show things. Also Satan is real and he will speak in dreams also. The question of interpatation is whether it comes from Holy Spirit our familar spirits. A familar spirit is of Satans Kingdom and will seem correct but will in the end lead to error. Only God through Jesus by Holy Spirit can reveal a dream to someine in truth. There is no set science it is about relationship with the Lord.

So God gave BV "tha gift of interpreting dreams" but not the gift of being able to hit spell/grammar check...oh well, I guess God can only give so much to each individual...after all, there's a lot of people in the world and only so many gifts to go around...

Waking up from a weird dream...now I feel shitty...

2007-01-26T22:24:00.000-08:00

"Ennui has made more gamblers than avarice, more drunkards than thirst, and perhaps as many suicides as despair." ~ C.C. Colton

I just woke up from a weird dream...it involved me giving Skum from Skumlove a ride home where we passed through an area about two miles away from my house...in reality, this area has a little business plaza with a laundromat, liquor store, Blockbuster, donut place, tailor, etc...but in the dream it was a library and there was a giant, violent police shootout going on...I can't even describe it other than that it all looked rather fucked up...when we cleared that area and proceeded with the goings home, Skum tried to put in a CD by some French songstress whose name I can't remember...then I woke up...

Now I feel dehydrated and nauseous and I've got a headache...not entirely sure why...but I got up and got a bottle of Gatorade and finished in it in a few seconds...now I'm posting shite because I fell asleep with the computer running and I'm not sure what to do at this moment...I'd play Warcraft but my brain is just kind of 'eh' right now...

Fully Operational Again Soon?

2007-01-24T10:49:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Empty Hands" by Bomb Child

Sorry I've only been doing random little posts here and there...just been dealing with A LOT of SHITE/depression/job hunting/drinking...at this particular moment I'm at work (just had my one year anniversary at this shithole yesterday) and emotionally I'm not sure if I'm going to cry or vomit...or both...I've been really sad for the past couple days for several reasons...haven't had the time/energy/ambition to do much....like type up new trivia...or check out the blogs of all you fine (read: twisted) folks who drop by here on a regular basis.

So yeah...that's what's going on...I'll try to crawl out of the bottle sometime soon...and Bomb Child is the shit if you dig kick ass rock n' roll: http://www.myspace.com/bombchild

Because a weird, pink-haired girl and three puppets just can't be wrong...

2007-01-22T23:39:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Loss from a Distance" by Buckethead

Oh, wait...it's not pink, it's lightish red...!

And oh yeah, "24" is THE SHIT!

Fuck Fuck Fuckity Fuck FUCK!!!

2007-01-22T16:51:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Stripped" by Rammstein (from the uber-special-ultra-deluxe edition of Volkerball)

I always get nervous around new people and in situations where I'm calling someone for the first time and shite like that...I got a message regarding a job interview and when I called back I blanked...I sounded like a retard applying for his first job ever and I even started to give the wrong phone number (I did correct myself, but still)...I'm not going to be surprised if they don't even call me back...it was a good opportunity, too...I've been fucking up a lot lately...FUCK!

Aaaaak! They're After Me...

2007-01-20T23:49:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Tent in Your Pants" by Peaches

I knew I should've eaten this bitch's face off before she had a chance to call in the cavalry...

Pooing Penguin

2007-01-20T23:46:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Fuck or Kill" by Peaches

Let's face it...you're day just ain't complete without a picture of a pooing penguin...that looks like it's humping another penguin

Heavy Clothes...

2007-01-20T11:37:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Conflict - The Argument Goes On..." by Mushroomhead

So I went to the doctor yesterday and when they weighed me the scale read that I'm 128 pounds... I had just weighed myself that morning and my scale read that I was 113 pounds...and I was only in my skivvies at the time... So that means that I was wearing about 15 pounds of apparel/accessories by the time I got to the doctor...all that included long-sleeve red shirt, black short-sleeved button-up overshirt, black cargo pants, black underwear, black socks, black shoes (Skechers work-boot type things that aren't really boots), wallet, cell phone, keys, knife (it's a box cutter I use for opening shite at work...but yeah, I had a knife on me going in to a doctor's office...haha!)...that is all...

I Am What I Drink...

2007-01-16T14:30:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Broken Skin" by Mortiis

You Are Whiskey

You're a tough drinker, and you take it like a man

That means no girly drinks for you - even if you are a girl

You prefer a cold, hard drink at the end of the day

Every day, in fact. And make that a few.

What Alcoholic Drink Are You?

TQFS #12 Answers!!!

2007-01-15T16:05:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Your Gaulish War" by Eluveitie

Listed below are the LONG-AWAITED answers to TQFS #12! Sorry for the delay and my apologies in advance if my blogging and upcoming trivia is kinda sporadic in the near near future... Long story short, in a nutsack, I got REALLY screwed over at work and that was the huge bomb dropped on me last week. I didn't do anything wrong and I wasn't fired or anything...so I'm still employed, but I'm not happy...so I've been making lots of calls, sending lots of emails, and drinking lots of whisky in the past week... "Does he look like a bitch?!?!... ... ...then why are you trying to fuck him like one?"...oh, I love that Sam Jackson...

HDD got the high score on this installment with 5 out of 10 correct...

1. What is the state flower of New Mexico?
C. The Yucca

2. Out of all the toys released in 1994, the most popular were “Lion King” toys and what?
C. Power Rangers

3. The catfish has more taste buds than any other animal. How many taste buds does it have?
B. 27,000

4. How much did the bra Marilyn Monroe wore in “Some Like It Hot” sell for?
A. $14,000

5. In the Homestar Runner cartoon “The House that Gave Sucky Treats,” what/who did Strong Bad come dressed as?
C. Carmen Sandiego
"Where in the world is my candy?"

6. The three best-known Western names in China are Jesus Christ, Richard Nixon, and:
B. Elvis Presley
Those three names together sound like the start of a really bad joke...

7. Tegestology refers to what?
B. The collecting of beer coasters
Amazingly sad, ain't it?

8. A speleologist studies what?
A. Caves

9. About what percentage of the world is left-handed?
B. 10%
And supposedly 10% of the population is gay...coincidence??? Please don't hurt me, Yas (who is left-handed...not gay...)...

10. A magic potion/charm thought to arouse sexual love, especially toward a specific person, is known as:
B. A philter
Well, I guess the phallus and the aphrodisiac would help...

SWIPED from Yasamin

2007-01-14T03:04:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Baby, I Love You" by The Yayhoos

Click the above link to listen to my favorite song of the moment...

Many thanks to Yasamin for the zombie DEADication (I left a comment just now!) and for the following blog content:

1) Your favorite Ben and Jerry's ice cream?
I'm lactose intolerant...

2) Would you rather fall into a pit of non poisonous snakes or spiders?
Snakes...less of a chance of them crawling their way into any of my orifices...orifici? Hmmm...

3) Mustard or Ketchup?
MUSTARD! I love mustard...and catsup really doesn't taste like tomato in my opinion... Hehehe...ever seen that Maury Povich episode about phobias? Here's a link that has a woman with a fear of birds and then a woman who has a fear of mustard...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=98RFlHQZsA8

4) Chicken or steak?
Steak...

5) Mexican, Chinese, or Italian?
Mexicans can be hot, but most of them are Catholics, which is OK, but if I were dating one I'd hate for her to drag me to church... Not too into Chinese chicks...I like Asians, but prefer the darker skinned islanders... Italians are great because of their accents...

6) New York, L.A., or Boston?
Never been to NY or Boston...and I'm a native Angeleno, so I'll say L.A.

7) Tom Hanks, Mel Gibson, Nick Cage, or Denzel Washington?
What a shitty list...Daniel Craig has the most gorgeous blue eyes...I'd go gay for him...Gerard Butler is (as a coworker of mine once said) a hunka hunka piece of man meat...Clive Owen is quite sexy...but good god, none of the above in the original question...

8) Kate Hudson, Zeta Jones, Nichole Kidman, or Beyonce?
Again, what a shitty list... I'm hot for Gina Torres (NEBULA THE PIRATE QUEEN from Hercules: The Legendary Journeys)...gorgeous woman with a gorgeous voice...

9) Star Wars or Star Trek?
Never a Star Wars fan...and since I once worked for Viacom, I'll say Star Trek...

10)Alien or Predator?
AVP!!! I like the Predator...kick ass weapons and cool dreadlocks...

11)Have a job you hate with oodles of money or a job you love with little?
There's something to be said about happiness...

12)Will you pay ungodly amounts to see a movie you have been waiting to see in a theater?
What kind of a dumbshit question is this? There are very few movies that I'll drag my ass out of the house to see opening day...like The Devil's Rejects...or Land of the Dead, which I took a day off of work to go see the first possible showing in my area...but I can wait...I would never pay ungodly amounts of money to see anything...well, unless it were Gina Torres in a zombie porn...

13)In a zombie crisis will you?...a) grab a blunt instrament and run out to face the world. b) barricade yourself in with your roommates or whoever is there. c) call shea for advice. d) go to Walmart ...
I'll say: e)run to the aid of Yasamin
Just remember that you don't need to reload knives or blunt objects...that gun is only going to last you so long, but while you have it, AIM FOR THE HEAD! When the zombie apocalypse hits (and I'm crossing my fingers hoping to see the day it happens) I'll be out there slaying the undead masses...any excuse to kill people, living or otherwise, is good enough for me...

14)Do you believe or are you open to the idea of Bigfoot?
Fuck yeah, I've seen it, too! I used to watch monster truck racing all the time as a kid!

15)Do you believe in giant squids like in 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea?
Fuck yeah...and I want to believe in whatever the fuck those things were in Deep Rising...love that flick...

16)Rather be attacked by an alligator or shark?
Alligator... Hopefully Betty White will be in the background cheering it on as it tries to eat me...that'd be a trip..."If you didn't like Lake Placid you're probably on fake acid!" ~ Cheri Oteri ...

17)Would you rather write a best seller or make a blockbuster?
Blockbuster...zombie blockbuster...NO FUCKING RUNNING ZOMBIES, though...

18)Mountains or beaches?
Beaches...I have a fear of heights...

19)Armageddon or Deep Impact?
Haven't seen either...but isn't Morgan Freeman in Deep Impact? If so, I vote Deep Impact...and I don't think I'll be losing any sleep if I never see Armageddon...

20)If you were to put in a cd right now what would it be?
Finntroll's "Nattfodd"

21)If you were to put in a movie right now what would it be?
"Dawn of the Dead"...the original..."When there's no more room in Hell, the dead will walk the earth..."
Note to Yasamin: "28 Days Later" is not actually a zombie movie, but it was marketed as one...and I feel that that movie, as good as it was, is ruining the zombie genre with whole 'running zombie' deal... The creatures in "28 Days" were infected with a psychological rage virus, hence why they were called 'the infected' and not 'zombies'...Danny Boyle has even gone on record to say that they were not zombies... Running zombies (which I first saw in "Return of the Living Dead" YEARS AGO) make no sense anyways...atrophy and rigor mortis would prevent them from sprinting after their prey...

22)Who is your favorite character in Lord of the Rings?
Gandalf...because he smokes the halflings's 'weed'...

23)Bracelets, anklets, or necklaces?
Um, I do own a shark tooth necklace...but none of the other stuff...

25)Ben Stiller, Jim Carrey, Vince Vaughn, Will Ferrell, or Owen Wilson?
What's with all the shitty lists?!?!...BRUCE CAMPBELL!!!

26)Would you go see a movie no matter how bad it looked just because you love the director or cast?
Depends...will there be alcohol involved?

27)If you were just hit by a truck and were lying out in that gutter and you had time to sing one song...just one song, with any band in the world, what song would it be and with what band behind you playing?
Since it was a truck, I'll say C.W. McCall's "Convoy"

28)Ever danced with the devil in the pale moon light?
Yeah...and I even used to fuck her, but then she ran off with some married Thai bastard...

29) Who is your favorite Batman villain?
CATWOMAN...Eartha Kitt was fuckin' hot...!

30) If you were just hit by a truck and you were laying out in that gutter and had time to pick one director...just one...to tell the story of your life, who would it be?
George Romero...because then I would rise from the dead after being hit by the truck...

Uggghhh...

2007-01-10T23:36:00.000-08:00

Hey all, I'll try to post the trivia answers soon...hopefully sometime Thursday afternoon or evening...but I might take a few days off from the blog because I just got a huge bomb dropped on me and I'm not happy and I'm a bit of an alcoholic mess right now (and will probably remain in that state for a bit)...

...as soon as I crawl out of the bottle, I'll let you know...

Until then, here's a 'Behind the Scenes' still from 'happier' times when I was in the midst of taping my zombie apocalypse:

For All You MySpace Users...

2007-01-08T23:44:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Welcome to Bucketheadland" by Buckethead

NEW QUIZ BELOW THIS POST!!!

I just uploaded a whole helluvalotta still frames (in the PICS section) on my MySpace page from a short flick I did for a 'film' class back in the Fall of 2004. The project was supposed to involve a chase scene...I called mine "Dawn of the Ted" (starring my brother Doug)...the title is an obvious homage to George Romero, but has nothing to do with zombies...

I've added captions to each of the frames that essentially tell the whole story of the flick...sorry if some descriptions are lacking...MySpace only allows you to type so much for captions...

I think you have to be a MySpace member to view pics on someone's profile...so even if you don't want to be on MySpace, create a profile so you can view myself and members of my family make asses out of ourselves...

Click the link above (or click here) and enjoy!...and leave comments!

Trivia Quiz for Squiggle #12

2007-01-08T15:16:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to "Invert the Virgin" by Goatwhore

1. What is the state flower of New Mexico?
A. The Orchid
B. The Rose
C. The Yucca

2. Out of all the toys released in 1994, the most popular were “Lion King” toys and what?
A. Tamagotchi
B. Beanie Babies
C. Power Rangers

3. The catfish has more taste buds than any other animal. How many taste buds does it have?
A. 17,000
B. 27,000
C. 37,000

4. How much did the bra Marilyn Monroe wore in “Some Like It Hot” sell for?
A. $14,000
B. $39,000
C. $55,000

5. In the Homestar Runner cartoon “The House that Gave Sucky Treats,” what/who did Strong Bad come dressed as?
A. Princess Leia
B. The Spanish Inquisition
C. Carmen Sandiego

6. The three best-known Western names in China are Jesus Christ, Richard Nixon, and:
A. Ronald McDonald
B. Elvis Presley
C. George Washington

7. Tegestology refers to what?
A. The study of the digestive tract
B. The collecting of beer coasters
C. The tracking of earthquakes that occur in deserts

8. A speleologist studies what?
A. Caves
B. Phonetics
C. Soap

9. About what percentage of the world is left-handed?
A. 5%
B. 10%
C. 20%

10. A magic potion/charm thought to arouse sexual love, especially toward a specific person, is known as:
A. An aphrodisiac
B. A philter
C. A phallus

TQFS #11 Answers!

2007-01-05T12:08:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Hard Rock Hallelujah" by LORDI

This quiz saw the highest scores so far...with Yasamin getting the highest TQFS total to date with 9 out 10 correct...! Tied for second were jen and HDD with 8 out 10...then Doug with 7 out of 10...followed by mg with 5 out 10, but I'm going to give her 6 out of 10 for her two improvised answers as I always appreciate creativity (hey, it's MY quiz, and I'll cry if I want to...no wait, that's not it...)...

1. Skippy is a young rabbit from what animated feature?
A. Robin Hood

2. After his hallucinations, where does Dumbo wake up the following morning?
A. On top of a tree
For argument's sake, did I ever say WHEN and WHERE he had the hallucinations? Hmmm?!?!?!?...I'm kinda sad no one guessed C...

3. In the Lion King, where does Mufasa and his family live?
C. Pride Rock

4. In the Little Mermaid when Ariel sees Prince Eric, what type of celebration was happening on the ship?
B. A birthday party

5. In which of these three Disney animated features will you find a cat named Lucifer?
A. Cinderella

6. Of these Disney princesses, which is the only one with brown eyes?
A. Snow White

7. In Sleeping Beauty, what is it that Prince Phillip tells his horse Samson he will not be receiving, after being dumped into the stream?
A. He will receive "No Carrots"

8. Where did Disney's Song of the South make its 1st premiere?
B. Atlanta,GA

9. In Aladdin, what does Jasmine steal from the Marketplace?
C. An apple

10. In Lady & the Tramp, by what name did Tony call the Tramp?
A. Butch

Trivia Quiz for Squiggle #11

2007-01-03T13:31:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Supermonstars (The Anthem of the Phantoms)" by LORDI

TQFS X answers listed below this post!

Based on a comment from Jen, today's quiz is all Disney-related...I figured that's sorta fair game for everybody...

1. Skippy is a young rabbit from what animated feature?
A. Robin Hood
B. Bambi
C. The Fox and the Hound

2. After his hallucinations, where does Dumbo wake up the following morning?
A. On top of a tree
B. In a big top tent
C. In a New Jersey hooker's apartment next to empty bottles of cheap liquor and a pile of dirty needles...

3. In the Lion King, where does Mufasa and his family live?
A. Flat Rock
B. Brag Rock
C. Pride Rock

4. In the Little Mermaid when Ariel sees Prince Eric, what type of celebration was happening on the ship?
A. A baby shower
B. A birthday party
C. An engagement party

5. In which of these three Disney animated features will you find a cat named Lucifer?
A. Cinderella
B. Fantasia
C. Robin Hood

6. Of these Disney princesses, which is the only one with brown eyes?
A. Snow White
B. Sleeping Beauty
C. Cinderella

7. In Sleeping Beauty, what is it that Prince Phillip tells his horse Samson he will not be receiving, after being dumped into the stream?
A. He will receive "No Carrots"
B. He will receive "No Apples"
C. He will receive "No Donkey Show"

8. Where did Disney's Song of the South make its 1st premiere?
A. Anaheim, CA
B. Atlanta,GA
C. Orlando, FL

9. In Aladdin, what does Jasmine steal from the Marketplace?
A. A necklace
B. A piece of bread
C. An apple

10. In Lady & the Tramp, by what name did Tony call the Tramp?
A. Butch
B. Max
C. Mongrel

TQFS X Answers!

2007-01-03T12:28:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Wake the Snake" by LORDI

So there was a three-way tie between Doug, mg, and the High Desert Diva, with 24 out of 50 each...Yasamin got 21 out of 50, and Jen got the answers right to all three questions she answered/commented on.

1. What was the last Disney animated feature to use hand-painted cels and analog camera and film work?
A. The Little Mermaid

2. The code title for Disney's "The Incredibles" (to protect the movie's secrecy) was what?
B. Tights
Answer A, "Sand Dogs," was actually the code title for Star Wars: Episode III

3. What fictitious brand of cigarettes make appearances in Quentin Tarantino's movies?
C. Red Apple

4. In the first Predator movie, the Predator's blood was made out of glow sticks and what?
A. KY Jelly

5. What was the body count in the first Predator movie?
C. 64
You should all know by know that, more often than not, "37" will be an incorrect answer...can anyone (I know Doug will get this) tell me what that number refers to?

6. In the German version of Die Hard, the terrorists are not from Germany. How are they referred to?
C. Just plain "Europeans"

7. What is the Hungarian title for Die Hard?
B. Give your life expensive
It actually wasn't hard to come up with the two fake answers...I guess that's due to the Asian in me...the sequels to the Hungarian versions of Die Hard are "Your life is more expensive", and the third part is "The life is always expensive"

8. In the movie Mean Girls, the movie Janice and Damian are watching on Halloween is:
B. Friday the 13th: Part 2

9. How many times does the word fuck (and its variations) appear in the movie Bad Santa?
A. 147

10. What is the estimated total monetary value spent on golf balls by golfers annually?
C. $800 million

11. In poker, what is the chance of drawing a flush?
B. 1 in 500

12. The first soccer World Cup was held in what country in 1930?
B. Uruguay

13. Which of these rock/metal bands covered Heaven 17's "Temptation" this year (2006)?
C. Cradle of Filth (from England)

14. How much does the International Space Station weigh?
A. 500 tons

15. What was the first American satellite in orbit?
A. Explorer I

16. What is a cluster of bananas called?
C. A hand
A hand consist of 10 to 20 bananas, each one referred to as fingers

17. Banana plants are the largest plants on earth without a woody stem. They are actually what?
A. Giant herbs
And they are of the same family as lilies, orchids, and palms

18. About how many eggs does a female mackerel lay at one time?
B. 500,000
That's a lotta fuckin kids...

19. How many times a second can a woodpecker peck?
B. 20
And that's a lotta peckin'...

20. What was the first cartoon character to have been made into a balloon for a parade?
B. Felix the Cat

21. About how long can human tapeworms grow up to?
B. 23m

22. On average, about how many chinchillas does it take to make a fur coat?
B. Anywhere between 60 to 100

23. How long does it take to boil an ostrich egg?
B. 40 minutes

24. What the Hell is poshintang?
A. Dog meat soup

25. Macaroni, Gentoo, and Chinstrap are types of what?
B. Penguins

26. What is the medical term for a natural gap between two teeth?
A. Diastema

27. What was the name of Sir Isaac Newton's pet Pomeranian?
B. Diamond

28. What is the real first name of actor Lon Chaney Sr.?
C. Alonzo

29. How many patents are attributed to Thomas Edison?
C. 1,093

30. What is Pat Benatar's maiden name?
B. Andrzejewski
Bryniarski is the last name of the guy who portrays Leatherface in the new Texas Chain Saw movies...Anatevka is from Fiddler on the Roof...

31. What is the first name of the TV character MacGyver (played by Richard Dean Anderson)?
A. Angus
Would've been cooler if he were Bob MacGyver...

32. What is the adjectival form for a mongoose?
C. herpestine
Hystricine = porcupine, equine = horse

33. What are the first and middle name of A.A. Milne?
B. Alan Alexander
To answer Yasamin's question, A.A. Milne created WINNIE THE POOH!

34. What is Princess Leia's adopted last name?
C. Organa

35. In Sue Grafton's alphabetical ongoing series of whodunits, "C is for_____":
C. Corpse

36. Geza is the middle name of which actor?
B. Ben Affleck

37. Bechuanaland is the former name of what nation?
B. Botswana

38. In Pac-Man, the four ghosts are Inky, Blinky, Pinky, and:
C. Clyde

39. What was the Bank of America known as when it was founded in San Francisco in 1904?
A. Bank of Italy

40. What did it say on the sign on the outer fence at the Addams Family residence in the TV sitcom?
A. Beware of The Thing
B. Weird is Relative
C. Abandon All Hope
"Weird is Relative" was the tag line for the first Addams Family movie and "Abandon All Hope" is from Dante's "Inferno"...when Dante passes through the Gate of Hell, the inscription on the gate reads: "Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate" or "Abandon all hope, ye who enter here."

41. What is the technical term for a palm reader?
A. Chiromancer
Zoroastrianism is the religious system founded by Zoroaster and set forth in the Avesta, teaching the worship of Ahura Mazda in the context of a universal struggle between the forces of light and of darkness. Thaumaturge is another word for magician

42. What does "zwitter" mean in German?
A. Hermaphrodite
You people obviously don't know your Rammstein...

43. What is the Australian equivalent to the Academy Award?
C. Lovely
And the Lovely goes to...hehehe...even though the following has nothing to do with the Aussie Oscars, this reminds me of Craig Ferguson's monologue from 11/27/06...so here 'tis...compliments of Doug...the 'significant' part starts around 2:20 in...

44. What is Kevin Spacey's real last name?
A. Fowler
Fowler, Kinsey, and Bunche are all names of buildings at UCLA, by the way

45. What is the raised part of a sundial that casts the shadow?
B. Gnomon
Definition of "glyptic" = of or pertaining to carving or engraving on gems or the like... "Gorelick" is Kenny G's last name

46. What was the original name of pop group New Kids on the Block?
B. Nynuk
Answer A, odium, means 'hatred' in Latin...here's the full English definition of the term: "intense hatred or dislike, esp. toward a person or thing regarded as contemptible, despicable, or repugnant."

47. The rock group Styx was once known as:
A. TW4

48. What is an amanita phalloides?
C. The world's deadliest mushroom

49. According to a Turkish proverb, coffee should be "black as hell,
strong as death, and _____":
C. as sweet as love

50. What was the name of Olive Oyl's boyfriend before Popeye?
A. Ham Gravy

Take Trivia Quiz #10 & No More Word Verification!!!

2007-01-02T12:07:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Girl from Ipanema" by Stan Getz/Astrud Gilberto

So far only Yasamin has taken the quiz (well, jen gave a mighty effort, but didn't complete it)...I didn't expect anyone to do it over the holidays, but tomorrow I'll have a new quiz up, so I just wanted to remind you all to take it by noon tomorrow! It's a few posts down now, so here's a quick link to it:
Trivia Quiz for Squiggle X

AND, based on a comment made by mg on Doug's blog, I have turned off Word Verification...I will brave the possible spam...

But if you don't want to take the quiz or, in Yasamin's/Jen's case, you've taken it already, here's a lovely painting by John Martin of the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah to keep you occupied so your journey to my blog today won't be a total waste:

"Blood Red Sandman" by Lordi

2006-12-28T18:12:00.000-08:00

"Blood Red Sandman" by Lordi

The TRIVIA is two posts down!

Kick ass band from Finland... Visually, it's obvious these guys got some influence from GWAR...not that I have a problem with that because I love it when costumed bands are done well... However, Lordi's music is totally unlike GWAR and is very 80's metal sounding...and this particular song's video is based on the "Evil Dead" movies (one part also reminds me of one scene from Dimension Films's "Dracula 2000")...killer music, killer image, and Evil Dead...just can't go wrong with that shite...!

Bukkake!

2006-12-28T17:08:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "12 Hundred" by Mushroomhead

NEW long awaited TRIVIA below this post!

Whether intentional or not, here's a random pic I found on the web that just might be my favorite image of the year:

Hehehe...actually, I really dig this one.

And as long as we're talking about bukkake, here's something I've shared before and will probably share again:
"I Like Bukkake"

If for whatever reason you don't know what bukkake is, check the Urban Dictionary...there is a great diagram that easily explains bukkake listed under the first definition...

Trivia Quiz for Squiggle X

2006-12-28T00:36:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to "Voir Sur Ton Chemin" by Bruno Coulais

Sorry for the hiatus... I was indeed truly busy with work and then, since I haven't had to go to work this week, this is the first time I'm turning my computer on since probably Friday...my virtually lifeless body kept having dreams of people poking me with sharp sticks... ... ...not sexually... Here is the long-awaited, and fuckin' huge, tenth installment of the Trivia Quiz for Squiggle.

Here also, are some freaks to check out:
Carrot Museum

1. What was the last Disney animated feature to use hand-painted cels and analog camera and film work?
A. The Little Mermaid
B. Beauty & The Beast
C. Aladdin

2. The code title for Disney's "The Incredibles" (to protect the movie's secrecy) was what?
A. Sand Dogs
B. Tights
C. Parrific

3. What fictitious brand of cigarettes make appearances in Quentin Tarantino's movies?
A. Nails
B. Schultz
C. Red Apple

4. In the first Predator movie, the Predator's blood was made out of glow sticks and what?
A. KY Jelly
B. Karo Syrup
C. Hair gel

5. What was the body count in the first Predator movie?
A. 22
B. 37
C. 64

6. In the German version of Die Hard, the terrorists are not from Germany. How are they referred to?
A. South Africans
B. Swiss
C. Just plain "Europeans"

7. What is the Hungarian title for Die Hard?
A. Live to gun tomorrow please
B. Give your life expensive
C. Vigilante justice extreme

8. In the movie Mean Girls, the movie Janice and Damian are watching on Halloween is:
A. Halloween III: Season of the Witch
B. Friday the 13th: Part 2
C. A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master

9. How many times does the word fuck (and its variations) appear in the movie Bad Santa?
A. 147
B. 238
C. 303

10. What is the estimated total monetary value spent on golf balls by golfers annually?
A. $100 million
B. $300 million
C. $800 million

11. In poker, what is the chance of drawing a flush?
A. 1 in 100
B. 1 in 500
C. 1 in 1,000

12. The first soccer World Cup was held in what country in 1930?
A. Panama
B. Uruguay
C. Brazil

13. Which of these rock/metal bands covered Heaven 17's "Temptation" this year (2006)?
A. Mortiis (from Norway)

B. Lordi (from Finland)

C. Cradle of Filth (from England)

14. How much does the International Space Station weigh?
A. 500 tons
B. 1,000 tons
C. 2,000 tons

15. What was the first American satellite in orbit?
A. Explorer I
B. Sputnik I
C. Hermes I

16. What is a cluster of bananas called?
A. A bunch
B. A spider
C. A hand

17. Banana plants are the largest plants on earth without a woody stem. They are actually what?
A. Giant herbs
B. Vegetables
C. Weeds

18. About how many eggs does a female mackerel lay at one time?
A. 250,000
B. 500,000
C. 1,500,000

19. How many times a second can a woodpecker peck?
A. 10
B. 20
C. 50

20. What was the first cartoon character to have been made into a balloon for a parade?
A. Mickey Mouse
B. Felix the Cat
C. Bugs Bunny

21. About how long can human tapeworms grow up to?
A. 15m
B. 23m
C. 37m

22. On average, about how many chinchillas does it take to make a fur coat?
A. Anywhere between 30 to 50
B. Anywhere between 60 to 100
C. Anywhere between 120 to 150

23. How long does it take to boil an ostrich egg?
A. 20 minutes
B. 40 minutes
C. 80 minutes

24. What the Hell is poshintang?
A. Dog meat soup
B. The Korean word for genital herpes
C. A type of coat made of leather and fur

25. Macaroni, Gentoo, and Chinstrap are types of what?
A. Parsnips
B. Penguins
C. Pastas

26. What is the medical term for a natural gap between two teeth?
A. Diastema
B. Diaphoresis
C. Diazepam

27. What was the name of Sir Isaac Newton's pet Pomeranian?
A. Cotton
B. Diamond
C. Euphrates

28. What is the real first name of actor Lon Chaney Sr.?
A. London
B. Leonard
C. Alonzo

29. How many patents are attributed to Thomas Edison?
A. 667
B. 841
C. 1,093

30. What is Pat Benatar's maiden name?
A. Bryniarski
B. Andrzejewski
C. Anatevka

31. What is the first name of the TV character MacGyver (played by Richard Dean Anderson)?
A. Angus
B. Seamus
C. Bob

32. What is the adjectival form for a mongoose?
A. hystricine
B. equine
C. herpestine

33. What are the first and middle name of A.A. Milne?
A. Artemis Ackerman
B. Alan Alexander
C. Alfred Alden

34. What is Princess Leia's adopted last name?
A. Jamillia
B. Alderaan
C. Organa

35. In Sue Grafton's alphabetical ongoing series of whodunits, "C is for_____":
A. Chills
B. Cover-up
C. Corpse

36. Geza is the middle name of which actor?
A. Keira Knightley
B. Ben Affleck
C. Jason Biggs

37. Bechuanaland is the former name of what nation?
A. Argentina
B. Botswana
C. Singapore

38. In Pac-Man, the four ghosts are Inky, Blinky, Pinky, and:
A. Shrinky
B. Kinky
C. Clyde
Although I must say, if there were a porno called "Shrinky, Kinky, & Clyde" the possibilities could be endless...and now, for no reason whatsoever, here's my list of possible titles for if the Star Wars movies were porno:
Episode I: The Phantom Menses
Episode II: The Sack of the Clones
(I wanted to say Attack of the Hos cuz that would be a damn funny movie title...porno or not...but I couldn't think of anything else for Episode IV and didn't want to use Hos twice)
Episode III: Revenge of the Slit
Episode IV: A New Ho
Episode V: The Empire Sucks Balls
Episode VI: Return of the Red Eye
Feel free to send me your list...on any movie/franchise...you lovely sick bastards, you!

39. What was the Bank of America known as when it was founded in San Francisco in 1904?
A. Bank of Italy
B. Bank of New York
C. Bank of London

40. What did it say on the sign on the outer fence at the Addams Family residence in the TV sitcom?
A. Beware of The Thing
B. Weird is Relative
C. Abandon All Hope

41. What is the technical term for a palm reader?
A. Chiromancer
B. Zoroastrian
C. Thaumaturge

42. What does "zwitter" mean in German?
A. Hermaphrodite
B. A mother's teat
C. Thong underwear

43. What is the Australian equivalent to the Academy Award?
A. Ariel
B. Genie
C. Lovely

44. What is Kevin Spacey's real last name?
A. Fowler
B. Kinsey
C. Bunche

45. What is the raised part of a sundial that casts the shadow?
A. Glyptic
B. Gnomon
C. Gorelick

46. What was the original name of pop group New Kids on the Block?
A. Odium
B. Nynuk
C. Tough

47. The rock group Styx was once known as:
A. TW4
B. Trivium
C. Christmas

48. What is an amanita phalloides?
A. A rare, fuzzy white spider
B. A Babylonian statue of an erect penis
C. The world's deadliest mushroom

49. According to a Turkish proverb, coffee should be "black as hell,
strong as death, and _____":
A. as bountiful as sand
B. as smooth as silk
C. as sweet as love

50. What was the name of Olive Oyl's boyfriend before Popeye?
A. Ham Gravy
B. Highland Dale
C. Sergeant Snorkel

Sorry!

2006-12-19T15:13:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "The Only One" by Ra

Sorry, I know I owe you guys trivia and I also have to make up for the last trivia quiz... I'm über-fükkin busy at the moment...work has been Hell, I feel like shite, and I'm under pressure to get the family XXX-Mas card done... But all these setbacks will only push me to make the tenth quiz the most kick-ass installment yet...it'll be HUGE...!

So until then, here's a picture of my boy (Smallsac) you can all marvel at...he'll be five on the 25th:

Need Help!...with...words...

2006-12-15T11:08:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Crusty Monkey" by Lunatics on Parole

I'm trying to compile a big-ass list of interesting words, out-of-the-ordinary words, etc that wouldn't be difficult for a kid to understand.

For example: SKEDADDLE
ske·dad·dle
–verb (used without object) 1. to run away hurriedly; flee.

It's not necessarily an everyday word and it's an interesting and fun-sounding word that I don't think would totally go over a child's head. Any input would be MUCH appreciated!

TQFS #9 Answers

2006-12-15T08:35:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Pirates Life for Me" by Buckethead

Looks like Doug is this installment's winner with 7 out of 10 correct...congrats, Doug!

1. How much food does a 1,200 pound horse eat each year?
A. Seven times its own weight

2. What is a capon?
B. A castrated rooster
Poor guy...

3. A polecat is not a cat…so what the Hell is it?
C. A nocturnal European weasel

4. A howler monkey’s call can be heard up to how many miles away?
B. Two

5. Infant beavers are called what?
A. Kittens
Kittens covered in spikes...I hate babies!

6. What is the instrument called that measures the force, velocity, or pressure of the wind?
B. Anemometer
The bathometer is an instrument for indicating the depth of the sea beneath a moving vessel and a sphygmomanometer measures blood pressure...

7. The base of the Great Pyramid of Egypt is large enough to cover how many football fields?
C. Ten

8. The linen bandages that were used to wrap Egyptian mummies averaged how many yards in length?
B. One thousand

9. What is the name of the metal instrument used in shoe stores to measure feet?
A. The Brannock device
Both the other names listed were from Pirates of the Caribbean...

10. Louis Cartier invented the wristwatch in what year?
B. 1904

Trivia Quiz For Squiggle #9

2006-12-14T13:55:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Bag It" by Peaches

1. How much food does a 1,200 pound horse eat each year?
A. Seven times its own weight
B. Ten times its own weight
C. Seventeen times its own weight

2. What is a capon?
A. An sweet tasting herb
B. A castrated rooster
C. A bar used to expand a piercing hole to make room for a larger piercing

3. A polecat is not a cat…so what the Hell is it?
A. A type of kangaroo
B. A skunk without the ability to spray its scent
C. A nocturnal European weasel

4. A howler monkey’s call can be heard up to how many miles away?
A. One
B. Two
C. Four

5. Infant beavers are called what?
A. Kittens
B. Grunts
C. Lunch

6. What is the instrument called that measures the force, velocity, or pressure of the wind?
A. Bathometer
B. Anemometer
C. Sphygmomanometer

7. The base of the Great Pyramid of Egypt is large enough to cover how many football fields?
A. Seven
B. Eight
C. Ten

8. The linen bandages that were used to wrap Egyptian mummies averaged how many yards in length?
A. Five hundred
B. One thousand
C. Thirteen hundred

9. What is the name of the metal instrument used in shoe stores to measure feet?
A. The Brannock device
B. The Cruces device
C. The Davenport device

10. Louis Cartier invented the wristwatch in what year?
A. 1895
B. 1904
C. 1913

Scattergories

2006-12-14T10:57:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Nordland" by Bathory

Sent to me by a co-worker...the trivia will be a little late today... There was an office XXXmas party last night and I didn't get home until late...so I'll be writing up today's questions during my lunch hour... Here are the unedited rules:

Rules: Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the following...They MUST be real places, names, things...NOTHING made up! If you can't think of anything, skip it. Try to use different answers if the person in front of you had the same 1st initial. You CAN'T use your name for the boy/girl name question.

Your Name: Scott

1. Athlete:
Seaver Miller (competitive eater)

2. 4 Letter Word:
Shit

3. Street Name:
Sepulveda Blvd.

4. Color:
Shortbus yellow

5. Gifts/Presents:
Sex toys

6. Vehicles:
Surfboard (hey, it gets you from a point A to a point B)

7. Tropical Locations:
Satan’s crotch

8. College Majors:
Sexual behaviour

9. Dairy Products:
Sour cream

10. Things in a Souvenir Shop:
Souvenirs…bitches!

11. Boy Name:
Simon

12. Girl Name:
Sophie

13. Movie Titles:
Sharkboy & Lava Girl (I worked on the DVD!)

14. Beers/Alcohol:
Sake

15. Occupations:
Sperm donor

16. Flowers:
Sunflower

17. Celebrities:
Satan

18. Magazines:
Seventeen

19. U.S. Cities:
Spread Eagle (I think it’s in Wisconsin)

20. Pro Sports Teams:
Saints

So Far in '06

2006-12-13T09:16:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to "Blood Gulch Blues" by Trocadero

Trivia answers to TQFS #8 are posted below this post! This is one of those questionnaire thingies that gets sent around... Here's my "So Far in '06"... Who knows, it could all change in the (little over) TWO weeks we have left for this year...!

SO FAR IN 2006:

(I still have no life...)

1. Have you had more than 5 different relationships?
Nope...

2. Have you had your birthday?
I’ve had 25 of them so far...

3. Been to church?
Not in ’06...went many many moons ago because my Mom made me do it...

4. Cried yet?
Not this year...I have no heart left to tell my eyes to cry…

5. Pulled an all nighter?
Ugh...yeah...

6. Drank Starbucks?
Never...!

7. Went shopping?
Probably too much...

8. Been camping?
Not in over a decade...

9. Been to the beach?
Yes, in Hawaii...it was really pathetic since I haven't swam since I was really young...being a 24 year old guy with long hair making a pathetic attempt at a doggie paddle was, well, pathetic...

10. Bought something for over 200 bucks?
New 'Line 6' amp...

11. Met someone?
How can you go a whole year without meeting a single soul?...this is a dumb question...

12. Been out of state?
Yup, first time out of state in, like, 17 years or so...went to Hawaii to help my buddy’s brother move in...it was three days of unloading and arranging furniture...

13. Gone Snowboarding?
Nope...not ever...I’d probably kill myself if I tried...

HAVE YOU:
1. Hugged someone?
I think so...

2.Slept in someone elses bed?
When I went to Hawaii we stayed at my friend’s brother’s new place…that wasn’t my bed...

3. Snuck someone over?
No need to...nothing to hide...

4. Snuck out of your own house?
No need to...nothing to hide...

5. Gotten drunk?
Not this year...yet...

6. Lied?
Of course! I work in the entertainment industry!

7. Gotten a car?
No...

8. Gone over your cell phone bill?
Not really...

9. Been called a whale?
Whathahell? I recall being called a prick when I suggested that my friend become a jizzmopper...we were trying to think of jobs that would most likely pay ‘under the table’...

10. Driven somewhere?
Every fucking day...who wrote these questions?

11. Done something you regret?
Of course!

LASTS:
1. Last thing you bought?
Dinner...at KFC...which may or may not have given me a weird allergic reaction last night...

2. Last person you hugged?
It’s been so long I don’t remember...

3. Last person to call you?
Not counting calls at work, it looks like the winner is Helsinki...not many people call me...

4. Last time you took a shower?
This morning...6AM PST

5. When was the last time you felt stupid?
Every fucking minute of every fucking day...

6. Who was the last person who saw you cry?
My mom...

7. Who was the last person who made you cry?
Some horrible whore...

8. Who was the last person you danced with?
Trolls don’t dance!

9. What did you do today?
Awoke, arose, showered, got in car, drove to work, logged onto computer, checked work emails, checked personal emails, doing this questionnaire...

PERSONAL:
1. Hometown:
Deadchester, CA

2. Natural hair color:
Dark brown

3. Eye color:
Hazel

4. Height:
5’ 6”

5. Pets:
Soft, then heavy...

6. Mood:
Pissed off...as usual...

WHICH OF THESE:
1. Love or lust?
There is no such thing as (romantic) love and lust is so elusive to me...oh well...such ridiculous questions...

2. Liquor or beer?
Whisky!

3. Night or day?
Night (of the Living Dead)...!

4. One night stands or relationships?
Does it matter? They're all using me for something anyways...

5. TV or internet?
Internet, I guess...that answer will change when the new season of '24' starts up...although I did just start watching 'House' recently which is just a brilliant fucking show...

6. Pepsi or Coke?
I'll have the blow, please...

7. Wild night out or romantic night in?
Night in...alone...with a bottle of whisky...

8. Black or white?
BLACK like the wilted stump I call a heart...

EMOTIONS:
1. Are you happy?
No, I’m at work...

2. Are you talking to anyone right now?
No...

3. Are you eating?
No...

4. Are you German?
I’m only half kraut...and what does this question have to do with emotions?

5. Are you Irish?
Nay...

6. Are you English?
Surely, no...

7. Do you like someone right now?
No one likes me, so why should I like them???

TQFS #8 Answers!

2006-12-12T17:23:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Ellytres" by Finntroll

mg and HDD tied on this one with 5 out of 10 correct...!

1. What is the natural substance in chocolate that is reputed to stimulate the same reaction in the body as falling in love?
B. phenylethylamine
I'm not even sure if endorphamine is a real word/thing...and Nymphetamine is the name of a Cradle of Filth album...

2. When honey is swallowed, it enters the blood stream within a period of how many minutes?
B. 20 minutes

3. Where did the white potato originate?
A. Andes mountains
Wow, no one guessed the correct answer on this one...

4. What is the correct response to the Irish greeting "Top o' the morning to you!"
A. "And the rest of the day to yourself"

5. What is the scientific name for the little lump of flesh just forward of your ear canal, right next to your temple?
C. Tragus
I've got nothing to say about the tragus, but here's what Wikipedia has to say about the gubernaculum:
The gubernaculum is a fold of peritoneum which attaches to the caudal end of the testes. As the scrotum forms, the gubernaculum causes the descent of the testes through the inguinal canal. In the adult, the vestigal remainder of the gubernaculum is known as the "scrotal ligament". In the female, the remnant is the round ligament of uterus...

6. The feet account for what percentage of the human body's bones?
B. 25%

7. What is banana oil actually made of?
C. Petroleum

8. What was the first drug ever to be marketed in tablet form?
A. Bayer Aspirin

9. Ancient artists of which country would never paint pictures of women's feet?
C. China
Ya know, Cinderella was originally a Chinese folktale... The Chinese have a weird thing about binding the feet of girls...it keeps the feet small and unusuable...so they can't run away...

10. How many tons of reddish-green paint does it take to coat the Eiffel Tower?
C. 300 tons
mg was the only one who got this right...

Six Weird Things...

2006-12-12T08:59:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Nottingham Lace" by Buckethead

The trivia answers will be up a bit later

Got this one from Yasamin who got it from...someone... The rule listed below is appearing in its original form, unedited...posted so I wouldn't seem lame...or whatever... I'm not going to be calling out 6 people because I probably only have (at most) six readers...so do what thou may...

Here are the rules: Each player of this game starts with the "6 Weird Things about You." People who get tagged need to write a blog of their own 6 weird things as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. Don't forget to leave a comment that says 'you are tagged' in their comments and tell them to read your blog!"

And my response to this is...only 6?...amateurs...wait, how graphic are we allowed to make this? Hehehe...OK, here's the mild version:

1. I'm a misanthropic, evil troll with a black and wilted stump for a heart...I wear black to work (including black socks and underwear), have long hair, two (not visible) tattoos, and I listen to mostly metal whilst I reside in the cubicle at said job...and what do I do for a living? I work in product development at a children's entertainment company where we mainly handle girls properties and I'm constantly surrounded by pink merchandse. I just pitched an idea for air fresheners today based on one of our main properties...it was well received...

2. Hey, speaking of those tattoos, my first one was of a cartoon porcupine I used to draw in Junior High and High School...it's below the belly-button area and on my right side and lines up with my underwear line so it looks like he's popping out of my underwear... The second is on the right side of my calf on my right leg...it's of the grim reaper holding an hour glass. I could tell you the meaning of the tattoos and why I placed them where I did, but eh...that would make for a long ass post...and I'm lazy... Next up are either zombies or trolls...or zombie trolls...

3. I have a really bad OCD where if I'm leaving my area of the house for an extended period of time (like to go to work), I unplug everything before I leave...turn off and unplug the power strip, unplug any appliances, even unplug the clocks...up until recently, I had to reset the time on my clocks whenever I came home...but I needed to buy a new clock radio thingie and bought this keen RCA clock/radio/cd player that has a sensor that picks up the time from the airwaves and also stores my alarm settings...

4. I hate driving large cars like pickup trucks, but I do have a fantasy about owning an ice cream truck. I want to drive down neighborhood streets at 5 miles per hour whilst blasting White Zombie out the loudpseaker...

5. I interned at Miramax in the TV/Airline department (aka: censorship)...me, of all people in censorship department. I read scripts (and looked at some storyboards) for films about to go into production and flagged stuff for alternate coverage, but mainly watched a lot of films to flag things to make edits on. I didn't actually do the editing... I got to see some cool stuff before it came out, but the majority of the films I watched were pre-existing Miramax movies sold to network TV and to airline for in-flight movies (hence the title of the department)...that's how I ended up watching "I Got the Hookup" about 6 times... Speaking of Miramax, I also helped out a friend in the home video department there and worked on DVD chapter stops (scene selections) for about 30 titles...most were acquisitions of the foreign and/or sci-fi nature...but out of the more well-known titles, I did "The Great Raid" (the theatrical cut DVD version...although they did use my stops as the template for the Director's cut) and "Sharkboy and Lava-Girl" (they gave my chapter stops to Robert Rodriguez and he adjusted them to his liking...I never got to meet him, though)...

6. I have a mannequin at my desk at work that I dress up in our company's pink, girly product combined with things I bring from home like gas masks, a hockey mask, a noose... I pulled her from our offsite storage to use at a trade show, but no one wanted to use her because she looked too realistic and hence, scary (they ended up using those headless, quadrapelegic male and female torsos instead)...since nobody wanted her, I kept her at my desk and plan to take her with me if I leave the company...her name is Angie.

Trivia Quiz For Squiggle #8

2006-12-11T08:59:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Go to Hell!" by GWAR

CORRECTION MADE: Doug brought it to my attenion that #5 had two "B" answers when "Tragus" should have been listed as "C" instead of another "B"...but that all doesn't matter now, I guess, because I fixed it...

All mixed up again this time...

1. What is the natural substance in chocolate that is reputed to stimulate the same reaction in the body as falling in love?
A. nymphetamine
B. phenylethylamine
C. endorphamine

2. When honey is swallowed, it enters the blood stream within a period of how many minutes?
A. 20 seconds
B. 20 minutes
C. 20 hours

3. Where did the white potato originate?
A. Andes mountains
B. The Alps
C. Mount St. Helens

4. What is the correct response to the Irish greeting "Top o' the morning to you!"
A. "And the rest of the day to yourself"
B. "Isn't it grand"
C. "God be with you"

5. What is the scientific name for the little lump of flesh just forward of your ear canal, right next to your temple?
A. Gubernaculum
B. Satorius
C. Tragus

6. The feet account for what percentage of the human body's bones?
A. 15%
B. 25%
C. 35%

7. What is banana oil actually made of?
A. Plantains
B. Kerosene
C. Petroleum

8. What was the first drug ever to be marketed in tablet form?
A. Bayer Aspirin
B. Tylenol Aspirin
C. Advil Ibuprofen

9. Ancient artists of which country would never paint pictures of women's feet?
A. Greece
B. Turkey
C. China

10. How many tons of reddish-green paint does it take to coat the Eiffel Tower?
A. 45 tons
B. 175 tons
C. 300 tons

TQFS #7 Answers

2006-12-08T15:22:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Bag It" by Peaches

The high score for this installment was High Desert Diva with a score of 7/10...then Doug with 6/10, followed by mg with 5/10... And OK, so HDD admittedly 'cheated' on the last question, but there's something to be said for honesty, ja?

1. A bibliophile is:
A. A collector of rare books
I was actually kind of hoping somebody would've guessed "Jesus freak" as the answer...

2. The term anthropophagy refers to:
B. Cannibalism

3. “Kemo sabe” means what in Navajo?
A. Soggy shrub

4. The first Hummer manufactured for civilian use was sold in what year?
B. 1992
And yes, it was bought by Arnold

5. How many bottles did Coca Cola sell in its first year?
A. 25!!!
And now they're one of the largest corporations out there...go figure...

6. In 4000BC Egypt, men and women wore glitter eye shadow made from what?
C. The crushed shells of beetles
Yeccchh...beetles on the eyes...

7. The condom was invented in the early 1500’s and was originally made of what?
B. Linen
Yup, it all started with linen...seems like that would've been uncomfortable...and American money is printed on linen...so if you're ever in a bind... ... ...ewww...

8. In what country did Russian dressing originate?
B. United States
Americans are also responsible for the Swiss steak, the hamburger, and chop suey...

9. What is an albumen?
A. The white part of an egg

10. A ‘jiffy’ is an actual unit of time and lasts for:
C. 1/100 of a second

For some reason I can't get that song "Somebody's Watching Me" by Rockwell out of my head...

PMS!

2006-12-07T14:08:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Burn in Hell" by Mercyful Fate

In my office, PMS can relate to TWO things...the first one is the obvious one, especially since I work with a lot of women and gay men...the second might not be as obvious as PMS also stands for Pantone Matching System. Pantone is a standard in the industry I work in and they create guides for more accurate communication of color in artwork. So if I want a specific shade of brown to go on a product and PMS469C is my desired color, then I communicate "PMS469C" to whomever I'm directing the orders to so I don't have to say "Could you make like a chocolatey brown, but try to make it fall somehwere between the color of milk chocolate and dark chocolate...?"... Nothing would ever get done (correctly), so the PMS is actually very helpful. What gets me is that some licensees give us the PMS callout number, but then they also come up with ridiculous names for the colors as well...and it's not like dark brown, light pink, or anything like that... Listed below are some names I've come across recently on product submissions and I've also listed 'common terms' to describe what the color actually is:
FIRE BLADE RED - it's really just your typical fire engine red
VANILLA GLASS - standard creme color
SAGE LAGUME - greyish green
VIOLET PASSION - red wine colored
WINTER APRICOT - a dull, dingy orange color
YELLOW STAR - a dull, dingy yellow color
VALLEJO TAN - dark khaki
BISCOTTI - beige
BABY FRENCH TERRY - dull pink
LIME SPLENDOR - it's just green
ALLEY PINK - interestingly enough, 'Alley Pink' has the same shade of 'the good kind of pink' if you know what I mean...

There's an endless supply of weird color names out there, but these were the most interesting recent ones...

Trivia Quiz For Squiggle #7

2006-12-07T09:59:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Tonight in Flames" by Cradle of Filth

I'll post the answers sometime tomorrow afternoon (or maybe even the early evening) so everyone will have a chance to take the quiz...

1. A bibliophile is:
A. A collector of rare books
B. A collector of fine liquor
C. A Jesus freak

2. The term anthropophagy refers to:
A. The study of homosexuality
B. Cannibalism
C. The examination of human remains

3. “Kemo sabe” means what in Navajo?
A. Soggy shrub
B. Sea salt
C. White storm

4. The first Hummer manufactured for civilian use was sold in what year?
A. 1989
B. 1992
C. 1996

5. How many bottles did Coca Cola sell in its first year?
A. 25
B. 125
C. 250

6. In 4000BC Egypt, men and women wore glitter eye shadow made from what?
A. Desert sand
B. Silt deposits from the Nile
C. The crushed shells of beetles

7. The condom was invented in the early 1500’s and was originally made of what?
A. Lamb skin
B. Linen
C. Goat intestine

8. In what country did Russian dressing originate?
A. Italy
B. United States
C. France

9. What is an albumen?
A. The white part of an egg
B. An undescended testicle
C. A type of mushroom that only grows in Antarctica

10. A ‘jiffy’ is an actual unit of time and lasts for:
A. Half a second
B. 1/10 of a second
C. 1/100 of a second

Famous Drag Queen...

2006-12-06T23:53:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Dysfunctional Doll" by Skumlove

Found this quiz cuz of Yasamin. These kinda things take up too much space on my MySpace page...there's already so much shite on there...so I'm posting it here instead...and when I pasted their 'safe HTML' as well as their 'not so safe?' HTML versions, it came out looking all fucked up...so that's why it looks different...I'm even posting all the questions and my answers!...I'm Divine!

1. What gender are you? - Male
2. How are you built? - Slip of a girly boy
3. What's your drag look? - Terror
4. What decade's clothes od you prefer to dress in? - Contemporary
5. Where do you get your clothes? - Thrift stores, discard bins, whatever I make myself
6. What music do you like? - Rock out
7. How do you want people to respond when they see you? - Fear
8. Where will we see you perform? - A B-Movie
9. What word describes you best? - Angry
10. What's your ideal job? - Musician
11. In you act, you are... - Playing a role. You're really an actor.

Take This Quiz

OK in my Book...!

2006-12-06T14:24:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Rise" by Korpiklaani

The trivia answers are two posts down!

I have no idea who the Eagles of Death Metal are (which is a pretty fucking stupid name, but whatever) other than what I just read in the News section of MTV.com. Apparently they opened one show (in Cleveland) on the current Guns N' Roses tour and then left the tour after that night... The current tour also features a burlesque show by the Suicide Girls before the first band hits the stage (by what I heard, at a previous GNR show the Suicide Girls filled in the gaps between sets to keep the crowd entertained which I thought was a smart move)...and people were booing SG in Cleveland! Well, this odd occurrence made EODM frontman Jesse Hughes realize something which led him to pull his band fro mthe tour:

"I saw people booing the Suicide Girls," he said, referring to the inked and pierced goth pinups who served as one of the night's other openers. "A rock show booing hot naked chicks is not a rock show — it's a freak show. And now I'm just sorry we won't be touring with the Suicide Girls every day."

Even if the EODM's music sucks sweaty, unshaven ass, Jesse Hughes is OK in my book...!

I'm Not Your Performing Monkey!

2006-12-06T13:43:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Decadent & Desperate" by Mortiis

I've been listening to all sorts of music all morning long that has made me think back to experiences at concerts...everything from the giant circle pit that took up the whole arena floor at the sole trek of The Pledge of Allegiance tour to that guy (who looked like he was) in his mid-40's that was jumping around like a kangaroo on speed at a Cranberries concert (remember that, Doug?)...

One thing that kind of pisses me off at concerts is when the performers onstage ask the crowd to do stuff...everything from clapping along to a beat, to jumping up and down at a certain point, to rushing the arena floor, to getting your middle fingers in the air, to singing along (or singing the words instead of the vocalist saying anything)... I'm not YOUR performing monkey, bitches! You are MY performing monkey! I'm paying YOU to jump and dance and sing... Personally, most of the time I just stand there and observe...I like seeing how the people perform, how they play the guitar parts, and all that jazz...

At the recent Blessed concert I went to, another AZ band called Element A440 opened...they were OK at some points, really bad others...and they took so long to setup and to fix their technical difficulties...and to tune a guitar in the middle of the set...but that's besides the point... I was right up front and towards the end of their set, the vocalist made a b-line for me at a part in the song where he was just screaming and fuckin' SCREAMED in my face for what seemed like forever...and I was just standing there...not knowing what to do...and, of course, not really wanting to do anything anyways...did he expect me to scream along or something? I can only imagine the look on my face as I was thinking in my head "Why are you screaming in my face?"...I know, an odd question to think to one's self at a rock concert, but still...I'm not his performing monkey and I'm not going to do something just because someone tells me to or because they're trying to get a reaction out of me... When he was done he just kind of patted my head like you would a dog when it obeys orders...then went about finishing the rest of the song...and I was still just standing there...thinking about how the first thing I would do when I got home would be to wash my hair...

TQFS #6 Answers!

2006-12-06T11:41:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "The Man Comes Around (Demo)" by Johnny Cash

Added @ 2:42PM, today, 12/06/06:
My apologies to Doug! I forgot to list who got the high score this week...who was, if you haven't figured it out by now, Doug!...and he got the highest TQFS score so far...7 out of 10! OK, now here are the answers:

1. When was "The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past" released?
B. April 1st ,1992
And no, I'm not going to say "April Fool's!" at the end of this comment...Doug did have a very good take on why C would be a reasonable answer.

2. According to the "F-Zero" manual, what year were the F-Zero races started?
C. 2560
Hehe...I put 2525 down as a possible answer because that's a reference to the short-lived Raimi/Tapert-produced "Cleopatra 2525" series...which was really bad but it had Gina Torres in it...and she's hot...great voice, too...and, yes, 'twenty exty six' was a reference to STINKO MAN!

3. Which is the name of one of the Ice Climbers in the NES game of the same name?
B. Popo
Look out for tha popo, yo!

4. What is the name of the viking who has the ability to jump in "The Lost Vikings"?
A. Erik the Swift

5. The story behind "Adventure Island" for the NES is that an evil witch doctor has kidnapped which Princess?
A. Leilani
And all the names of all the choices for this question are also the names of porn stars!

6. In "Star Fox" for the SNES, your mission is to defeat which evil emperor?
C. Andross

7. What was the soundtrack intended to resemble in the game "Asteroids"?
A. A heartbeat

8. "Centipede" was created by two programmers. One was veteran Ed Logg, who had also created "Asteroids". What was relatively unique at the time about Logg's collaborator on the game?
A. The collaborator was a woman

9. Which of these games featured an air pump as the main weapon?
B. Dig Dug
I held the Dig Dug high score on the plug n' play Atari thingie we had at Miramax...that and my high score on Galaga were my only claims to fame there...how sad...

10. What kind of animal is Blathers, who runs the museum, in "Animal Crossing"?
C. Owl

The Legend of Hamster

2006-12-05T13:31:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Jumalten Kaupunki/Tuhatvuotinen Perintö" by Moonsorrow

Live action hamster video game video!
The trivia is below this post...

Trivia Quiz For Squiggle #6

2006-12-05T00:58:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Sea of Expanding Shapes" by Buckethead

I hope you all like video game trivia...and if you don't, then too bad cuz that's what you're getting this week! Haha! The next batch will be a mixed bag...

1. When was "The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past" released?
A. February 14th, 1992
B. April 1st ,1992
C. November 29, 1992

2. According to the "F-Zero" manual, what year were the F-Zero races started?
A. 2525
B. 20X6
C. 2560

3. Which is the name of one of the Ice Climbers in the NES game of the same name?
A. Pluto
B. Popo
C. Pringle

4. What is the name of the viking who has the ability to jump in "The Lost Vikings"?
A. Erik the Swift
B. Olaf the Stout
C. Baleog the Fierce

5. The story behind "Adventure Island" for the NES is that an evil witch doctor has kidnapped which Princess?
A. Leilani
B. Kaylani
C. Leanni

6. In "Star Fox" for the SNES, your mission is to defeat which evil emperor?
A. Quorthos
B. Porthos
C. Andross

7. What was the soundtrack intended to resemble in the game "Asteroids"?
A. A hearbeat
B. Voodoo drums
C. A cricket chirping

8. "Centipede" was created by two programmers. One was veteran Ed Logg, who had also created "Asteroids". What was relatively unique at the time about Logg's collaborator on the game?
A. The collaborator was a woman
B. The collaborator was a 13 year old boy
C. The collaborator was on the other side of the country from Logg. The two men passed code between each other over modems and did not actually meet until the game was ready for production

9. Which of these games featured an air pump as the main weapon?
A. Tempest
B. Dig Dug
C. Wabbit

10. What kind of animal is Blathers, who runs the museum, in "Animal Crossing"?
A. Alligator
B. Chipmunk
C. Owl

White & Nerdy

2006-12-05T00:16:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "White & Nerdy" by Weird Al

I was watching this video (I think I'm done with my air freshener presentation work for the night) and since Yasamin shared the "Shoes" video, I thought I'd post this one...it's just brilliant...

The above video is one of the better ones from YouTube...but I think the image quality is better over at iFilm.

The Evening So Far...

2006-12-04T23:07:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: The South Park WoW episode playing in the background

I just deleted two posts and it's not because I'm giving in on anything...and I feel I had a very valid point, but that's not really the blog I want this to be... I'm just here to talk about stupid shit like zombies (which are fuckin' awesome), Gwyneth Paltrow, and the green cape from Swan Lake...and trivia... Speaking of which, I will have trivia on Tuesday...

I bought air fresheners today...pine scented ones for our fake XXX-Mas tree at home...the scent of which has spread all throughout the house...and it actually smells like the shampoo I use to clean the carpet in my car... I also bought character themed ones...Hello Kitty in two varieties (rectangular cardboard and molded figure), Dora the Explorer (rectangular cardboard), and a generic rectangular and sorta die cut cupcake scented one...I needed them as visual aides... I've been spending the majority of my evening trying to come up with a pitch for air fresheners as a product at work...of course, it would depend on if my work liked the idea and then if a licensee would actually want to do it...but yeah, just looking through style guides whilst various TV shows ramble on in the background...picking out sample poses that could work with my idea and going through the packaging guidelines to sketch up some mock packaging on the back of the envelopes to my bills... I may be doing some Photoshop work during my lunch break tomorrow at work...

It's not my ideal way of spending an evening at home, but I feel like if I can submit any idea that actually gets made, then I'll have made my mark in some way...that actually sounds lame as I read that back...but it's interesting to walk into a store and see something you had a part in making that's readily available to the public and you know that there's somebody out there who's actually going to buy it. In case whoever reads this didn't know, I did chapter stops (scene selections) on about 30 films for DVD...my first was a flick starring Christopher Lambert! ...and I have several of those titles in my collection... Whenever I go to Best Buy or Circuit City I always see something I worked on...it's a trip. We haven't done air fresheners at my current gig and I think we'd have many advantages given our characters and themes... Sure, I've approved product that will be on shelves next year, but there's a different feeling when it's something you helped bring to the table...so, yup yup, in case you were wondering what I do with my free time, the mystery is solved...!

"In Defense" of Gwyneth Paltrow

2006-12-04T01:52:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to:: "It Takes People Like You to Make People Like Me" by Buck Owens

Yeah, I almost can't believe the headline I just wrote...but here's a story from IMDB.com today:
Hollywood actress Gwyneth Paltrow's recent comments branding Americans as not as civilized or intelligent as their English counterparts has sparked fury in her homeland. The Los Angeles born actress made her remarks to a Portuguese newspaper last weekend, and almost immediately radio stations across America were besieged with angry callers regarding the Shakespeare In Love beauty's comments. She says, "I don't fit into the bad side of American psychology. The British are much more intelligent and civilized than the Americans. I love the English lifestyle. I'm not as capitalistic as America." However, one caller blasted back saying, "If she feels that way we are far better off without her."

I think people are forgetting one key part to what she first said: "The BAD side of American psychology." Granted, I can see how what she says after that could ruffle some feathers...but we Americans need to realize that we're not the best in the world....at everything...even if we'd like to think we are. We may just be the most powerful nation and (not that I've lived in any other country but) I almost don't see how life could be any better anywhere else (and I dig capitalism...we should all enjoy the fruits of our own labors), but we do have this certain quantity over quality attitude which leads to greed which leads to screwing other people over one way or another...and that's the same attitude that ruined BETA as a general consumer product, despite that it's the better home video format. So you see, we have our flaws... And we do still have a lot of prejudice towards people just because of the color of their silly human suits or sexual orientation or whatever...which I'm sure they have in the UK as well, and i may be wrong, but I get the impression that people treat each other over there based on class and not because of race or who they like to bump uglies with...this all sort of reminds me of something I heard in a movie or TV show where someone asked a British guy if he was gay...the Brit responded with "No, I'm British" to which the inquisitor replied "Isn't that the same thing?"...sorry, Squiggle...I mean no offense...

Anyways, who gives a fuck if Gwyneth Paltrow said this shit? What's there to get riled up about? She found a way of life that suits her better and it looks like she's going to carry on with it. She's not hurting anyone. If I said the same thing and it happened to be printed in some random newspaper, I highly doubt anyone would care. So go waste your hate on something more worthwhile, folks... I swear, all this shite going on in the world and people care about that Gwyneth Paltrow likes it better cavorting with the Queen's subjects than we on the other side of the pond...and in a way can you blame her? British humour is funnier and their metal is far above and beyond most American bands. Although I did snicker a little when she said "I'm not as capitalistic as America"...OK, giving her the benefit of the doubt, one could argue whether or not she is AS capitalistic AS America, but when you're a famous, wealthy movie actress and you're married to a "rock" star, that's pretty damn capitalistic...

The Dreams in Which I'm Dying are the Best I've Ever Had

2006-12-01T00:46:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Spot the Psycho" by Cornbugs

This is about a thought I've had for a while and it's not often that I talk to people about dreams, but with the reappearance (in my life) of the Gary Jules cover of the Tears for Fears song "Mad World" due to the XBOX360 game Gears of War, it brought up this idea/feeling in my mind again...

The line in the song implies that death is more of a release from the, well, mad world...but I'm taking this from the standpoint that a dream about dying would be a bad thing... Now, I would actually rather have a bad dream than a good dream. I've had some gnarly near-death, plummeting to my death, being chased by people who want to kill me, family members dying, etc, dreams and those are always bitchin' to wake up from because everything is OK when your consciousness snaps back into reality. In a "good" dream one experiences a wide variety of the unfathomable, the magical, the impossible...or perhaps just the out of reach...you fly, have super strength, are rich, get laid...but when you wake up from that shite it's all gone...what's the good in that? Once I had a dream (when I was in elementary school) where I had a suitcase full of foreign money - from ALL over the world...and you know how some foreign money can have a large number on the bill but then it only exchanges into a few U.S. bucks, ja? Well, for whatever reason in the dream it was legal in the U.S. to pay for stuff with foreign money and the currency amount printed on the money had to translate into U.S. dollars one for one...so 10,000 yen would be 10,000 dollars. I was rich...! Then my ass woke up...and I wasn't rich... ... ...not to say that being rich would necessarily make me happy and it's not like I'm poor, but that's still a shitty dream to wake up from....

TQFS #5 Answers

2006-12-01T00:27:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Morning (Peer Gynt)" by Edvard Grieg

Yasamin pulls in the highest score so far with 7 out of 10 correct...and Doug was a close second with 6. And Yasamin, many thanks for the birthday e-card! It's one of the best cards I've ever received...no bullshit...!

1. Adjusting for inflation, Cleopatra (1963), is the most expensive movie ever made to date. Its budget of $44 million is equivalent to:
B. $270 million
And that was one good-looking movie...as with all the Roman epics of that era in movie history, this movie was too damn long, but I love those old movies. No digital effects, no digital sets, extras, whatever...all the magic had to happen on the set...hmmm...

2. Although identified with Scotland, bagpipes are actually a very ancient instrument, introduced into the British Isles by:
A. The Romans

3. Bette Midler, Barry Manilow and many other famous vocalists got their start in a New York City club called:
A. The Continental Baths
CBGBs is probably the only NY club that I know of...so I was kind of throwing it in there for fun and kind of because I was too lazy to look up the name of another actual club in NYC...and I don't know if there's a Riviera club in New York, but it sounded kind of good...wasn't that the name of one of the casinos in Vegas Stakes?

4. How many Oscars did Walt Disney receive between 1931 and 1969?
C. 35

5. Who is the first character to speak in Star Wars?
A. C3PO

6. What was the name of Captain Jean-Luc Picard’s fish in Star Trek: The Next Generation?
B. Livingston

7. Donald Duck’s middle name is:
A. Fauntleroy
Here's what shows up in Wikipedia when you search for Fauntleroy

8. Who was the first Beatle to have a #1 hit single following the group's breakup?
B. George Harrison
With the track "My Sweet Love"

9. What was the first song to be performed in outer space, sung by the Apollo IX astronauts on March 8, 1969?
C. “Happy Birthday”

10. In 1938 Joe Shuster and Jerry Siegel sold all rights to the comic-strip character Superman to their publishers for:
B. $130

Trivia Quiz for Squiggle #5

2006-11-30T13:54:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Life After Death" by King Diamond

Sorry this is coming late in the day. I didn't write up the questions yesterday or last night because it was my birthday and I was too busy doing nothing (I took the day off work and slept until noon!)...well, I did mosey out of the house to see "For Your Consideration" which I didn't think was very good...it just wasn't funny (or not as funny as the other Christopher Guest movies)...it definitely had the most serious message (when you get to the last scene) out of all his movies, but it was kinda, just, eh...one of my Jewish co-workers said that I probably would've found it funnier if I were a Jew...so there you have it. When the day was almost over (10PM) I went back to the theatre to see "Casino Royale" which was actually very good. It took me a bit to adjust to Daniel Craig as Bond because he doesn't really look like your typical Bond, but he won me over and he's probably one of the best actors to play the role...Craig pulled off a convincing portrayal of a top-ranking secret agent and all the gritty shit they most likely have to go through...and I suppose this was intentional seeing as how this is Bond when he first gained "00" status, but not everything he does is perfect...he slips up, stumbles, makes mistakes...it made the role more human. Now for the quiz:

1. Adjusting for inflation, Cleopatra (1963), is the most expensive movie ever made to date. Its budget of $44 million is equivalent to:
A. $190 million
B. $270 million
C. $360 million

2. Although identified with Scotland, bagpipes are actually a very ancient instrument, introduced into the British Isles by:
A. The Romans
B. The Moors
C. The Celts

3. Bette Midler, Barry Manilow and many other famous vocalists got their start in a New York City club called:
A. The Continental Baths
B. CBGB’s
C. The Riviera

4. How many Oscars did Walt Disney receive between 1931 and 1969?
A. 13
B. 29
C. 35

5. Who is the first character to speak in Star Wars?
A. C3PO
B. Luke Skywalker
C. Princess Leia

6. What was the name of Captain Jean-Luc Picard’s fish in Star Trek: The Next Generation?
A. Watson
B. Livingston
C. Einstein

7. Donald Duck’s middle name is:
A. Fauntleroy
B. Gaylord
C. Abernathy

8. Who was the first Beatle to have a #1 hit single following the group's breakup?
A. Paul McCartney
B. George Harrison
C. Ringo Starr

9. What was the first song to be performed in outer space, sung by the Apollo IX astronauts on March 8, 1969?
A. “Moon River”
B. “99 Bottles of Beer”
C. “Happy Birthday”

10. In 1938 Joe Shuster and Jerry Siegel sold all rights to the comic-strip character Superman to their publishers for:
A. $37
B. $130
C. $690

Movie Stars, Swimmin' Pools

2006-11-28T15:08:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Voodoo" by King Diamond

SWIPED from Yasamin's blog...trivia answers are below this post...

1. Popcorn or candy?
Hmmm…I’ll say candy because it seems that all the theatres I go to already have the popcorn buttered…I hate the yellow ooze they put on popcorn when I go to the movies…and it gives me the runs… I like non-buttered popcorn, but it had better have some fucking salt on it! I don’t really like candy either…but I’d rather have a few crappy pieces Nestle’s Buncha Crunch or whatever than get the runs…

2. Name a movie you've been meaning to see forever?
In regards to Yasamin’s answer, I’d have to say ewwww to Requiem for a Dream. I had a bad experience seeing that in the theatre…not only did I feel kinda dirty walking out of the flick, but I saw it with a bad crowd…people laughed at some of the most depressing, heart-wrenching (thank Christ I don’t have a heart anymore) moments which made me want to slay everyone…it’s a really sad movie… But what have I been meaning to see? A Clockwork Orange…I’m not a big fan of Kubrick’s stuff and I’ve always been turned off by the movie’s one-sheet art…that floating eyeball on Malcolm McDowell’s wrist…can’t be a good sign of things to come…and one of the most interesting things I’ve heard about the movie is about the apparent rape scene involving the song “Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head”…but I’m not always in the mood for watching people get raped…disemboweled, tortured (although I think the torture genre is getting out of hand), whatever…Hell, even the severed head sodomy in the unrated version of High Tension wasn’t so bad…but rape? Iduno…

3. You are given the power to recall one Oscar. Who loses theirs and to whom? Don’t care who loses it, as long as it gets sent to Gary Oldman…for anything…

4. Steal one costume from a movie for your wardrobe.
The demon’s green cape in the American Ballet Company’s version of Swan Lake…I can do without the cod piece though…I’d hate for some girl to get her hopes up and then find out the sad and pitiful truth…

5. Your favorite film franchise is...
EVIL DEAD!

6. Invite five living movie people over for dinner. Who are they? Why'd you invite them? What do you feed them?
1. Bruce Campbell – because he’s fuckin’ BRUCE CAMPBELL!
2. Marcus Nispel (director of the 2003 version of Texas Chain Saw and countless commercials/music videos) – he’s an artist and started his career as a painter…he loves to use light and always employs dramatic lighting effects in his work…I’d just like to have him over so he can teach me how to and what set up I would need so my domicile looks bitchin’ (lighting-wise)
3. Gary Oldman – because he’s fuckin’ GARY OLDMAN!!!
4. Paul W.S. Andersen – I respect his work but at the same time I’m a bit irritated with it…I love how he believes in practical effects and only uses digital when absolutely necessary (keep Event Horizon out of that argument)…but he’s got a CASTLEVANIA movie coming up, so I’d like to be able to sit down with him and hear his ideas so I can then retort and tell him how to not fuck it up (Castlevania is one of my most favorite video game franchises ever…if the movie sucks, some heads are gonna roll)…
5. Milla Jovovich – it’s like Smurfette…you need at least one girl in the group…and Milla’s just so damn hot…I would’ve picked Mariska Hargitay, but she’s primarily a TV actress and only plays bit parts in movies…when she does them…I gotta rewatch Lake Placid…
Oh, and we’d all eat Pizza Hut Meatlovers pizza with no cheese (I can’t have dairy) and extra sauce…because I’m lazy, they have to take what I give them, and I don’t like to cook for a group of people…

7. What is the appropriate punishment for people who answer cellphones in the movie theater?
Sodomy…with something hard and sand-papery…

8. Choose a male and a female bodyguard from a film:
Uh…I can’t think of any bodyguards…does Leeloo from The Fifth Element count? As for a dude? Ummm… ummm… Jason Voorhees…cuz he guarded his Mom’s severed head in the second movie…

9. What's the scariest thing you've ever seen in a movie?
Joan Rivers… =)
(But in regards to Yasamin's answer, if you want to see some SCARY boobs, go to awfulplasticsurgery.com and look up Courtney Love's scary rippling boobs...egad!)

10. Your favorite genre (excluding "comedy" and "drama") is...
ZOMBIE MOVIES!

11. You are given the power to greenlight movies at a major studio for one year. How do you wield this power?
ZOMBIE MOVIES! But no fucking piece of shit running zombies, damn it! I liked “28 Days Later” (and those are NOT zombies, by the way) but fuck you Danny Boyle for making that film and ruining the genre…it wasn’t the first ‘zombie’ movie with running ‘zombies’ but it was the first most prominent in the public eye…

12. If Jesus were to submit a synopsis of a documentary about life in America since 9/11, what would his p.o.v. be?
“Y’all are dumb”

13. Down in front all you troublemakers!!!
I expect Doug to take a stab at this…he’s really the only one I can call out on this one…

TQFS #4 Answers

2006-11-28T14:11:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "LOA House" by King Diamond

Yasamin once again conquers the competition with 6 out of 10 correct...but props to Doug for that little explanantion of acids and bases...and that bit on whale blubber, despite that that was the incorrect answer...

And not that I expect everyone to check my blog every day, but I am a little disappointed HDD wasn't able to chime in...therefore:

But I did come across quite a bit of food trivia, so maybe next time...I'll try to work on a 'tv shows anything from the 80's and warner brothers cartoons' installment for Yasamin...Doug, what do you want to be quizzed on?

1. How many flowers must a honey bee tap to make one pound of honey?
C. 2,000,000
That's a lot of tapping...

2. Astronaut John Glenn had the first meal in space when he ate what pureed food squeezed from a tube aboard Friendship 7 in 1962?
A. Applesauce
Not that applesauce is great, but if sardine paste and pureed salisbury steak was what they had to eat in space, I'd just go hungry...or eat the other astronauts...

3. Invented in 1889, what was the first ready-mix food to be sold commercially?
C. Aunt Jemima pancake flour

4. Frank Epperson invented what in 1905 when he was 11 years old?
C. Popsicle

5. Capsaicin, which makes hot peppers "hot" to the human mouth, is best neutralized by what?
A. Casein, the main protein found in milk

6. How many people can China's Beijing Duck Restaurant seat at one time?
B. 9,000
I kinda want to know how big the service staff is...

7. What was worth its weight in gold during the Alaskan Klondike gold rush (1897-1898)?
C. Potatoes
Yup, according to the source I got this from it's potatoes...I never would've guessed...it said that potatoes were valued for their high vitamin C content...I didn't know they had any vitamins...

8. During World War II, bakers in the United States were ordered to stop selling what for the duration of the war on January 18, 1943?
A. Sliced bread
No explanantion was given why this was or how it helped the war effort, but there ya go...

9. What was the profession of George Jung, who invented fortune cookies in 1916?
B. Noodle maker in Los Angeles

10. Arachibutyrophobia is the fear of:
B. Peanut butter sticking to the roof of one's mouth
I would really like to know how many people are afflicted with this condition...

Trivia Quiz for Squiggle #4

2006-11-27T02:45:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Lament" by Eluveitie

OK...I said from day one of the new trivia format that I always liked the 'Trivia for Squiggle' title better...and Hell, this all started because he asked for it!...so I'm switching it back but adjusting it slightly...and I know that this isn't technically the fourth installment of what is now TQFS, but it's the fourth installment of this format... I stumbled upon some food trivia, so this one goes out to HDD:

1. How many flowers must a honey bee tap to make one pound of honey?
A. 500,000
B. 1,000,000
C. 2,000,000

2. Astronaut John Glenn had the first meal in space when he ate what pureed food squeezed from a tube aboard Friendship 7 in 1962?
A. Applesauce
B. Sardine Paste
C. Salisbury Steak

3. Invented in 1889, what was the first ready-mix food to be sold commercially?
A. Lawry's seasoning mixes
B. Betty Crocker cake mix
C. Aunt Jemima pancake flour

4. Frank Epperson invented what in 1905 when he was 11 years old?
A. Lollipop
B. Cotton Candy
C. Popsicle

5. Capsaicin, which makes hot peppers "hot" to the human mouth, is best neutralized by what?
A. Casein, the main protein found in milk
B. Caffeine, the famed nervous system stimulant found in coffee, tea, cola
C. Sodium, a seasoning and preservative!

6. How many people can China's Beijing Duck Restaurant seat at one time?
A. 1,200
B. 9,000
C. 15,000

7. What was worth its weight in gold during the Alaskan Klondike gold rush (1897-1898)?
A. Whale blubber
B. Fresh beef
C. Potatoes

8. During World War II, bakers in the United States were ordered to stop selling what for the duration of the war on January 18, 1943?
A. Sliced bread
B. Goods containing chocolate
C. Danish

9. What was the profession of George Jung, who invented fortune cookies in 1916?
A. Courier in San Francisco
B. Noodle maker in Los Angeles
C. Owner of a Vietnamese restaurant in New York

10. Arachibutyrophobia is the fear of:
A. Seeing an arachnid being served as food
B. Peanut butter sticking to the roof of one's mouth
C. The 'brain freeze' effect that occurs when ice cream is consumed too quickly

I Grow Tired of Spielberg...

2006-11-24T14:40:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Fuel My Fire" by The Prodigy

In today's IMDB entertainment news, there was the headline "Spielberg Blasts "Irresponsible" TV Industry"...here's the full story:
Steven Spielberg has blasted today's television industry for exposing children to gruesome shows. The Saving Private Ryan director spoke out at the International Emmy's directors meeting in New York on Monday, warning producers to act more responsibly. He singled out graphic trailers which showed "blood and people being dissected" such as for forensic drama CSI: Crime Scene Investigation. Spielberg said, "I'm a parent who is very concerned. Today we need to be as responsible as we can possibly be, not just thinking of our own children but our friends' and neighbors' children. We certainly need to be responsible and careful about what we put into that box, because what comes out the other end truly has changed the world and will continue to change the world, for better or worse."

Now, not that everything Spielberg's done is uber-violent (I mean, the man did bring us Animaniacs), but when the guy does action, it's graphic, so he shouldn't even be talking... I haven't seen "Saving Private Ryan" because war movies and movies with Tom Hanks (a double whammy!) bore me...but everyone who has seen it always says I should at least watch the beginning...something about a cannon...or an exploding head...or both...or some shite like that... And let's not forget that Spielberg is the same asshole who brought us Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom...that was some sick shit, dude. So fuck off Spielberg...don't come out swinging with this whole "I'm a concerned parent" babble when some of your sickery is available in rental/retail outlets nationwide and on the movie channels on TV and in mommy and daddy's DVD collection...for every little girl and boy to 'enjoy'... You're just jealous because you haven't done anything entertaining since Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade and that programs like CSI are better than your schlock...well, except for those times like in CSI: New York when there was a murder at a rave-like party on a subway train and Gary Sinise said something like "And the next stop was murder"...or in CSI: Miami when David Caruso had three minutes to get an SUV with a timed bomb out of the building and onto the sands of an empty beach (yup, an EMPTY beach in MIAMI)...only to park the car, casually exit the vehicle, and non-chalantly walk away while putting his sunglasses on (in slow motion)...those were some pretty wretched moments...

Soundtrack, Vol. 2 - Take Cover!

2006-11-21T16:00:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Go to Hell" by GWAR

Trivia answers are listed in the post below this one!

For the second installment of this 'Soundtrack' feature, I've made it easy again...make a list of cool cover songs...either your favorites, ones that you feel were done remarkably well, whatever...and here's a repost of the, uh, 'rules':

A few guidelines: there really are no rules, but I figured I'd give this experiment some sort of structure...to keep it simple, come up with a list of ten songs. That seemed like the most reasonable number to me. I know you could fit more than ten 'standard length' songs onto a recordable CD, but, um, yeah...and be reasonable in not choosing like ten concertos or symphonies that are 20 minutes in length each...try to make it not go over 80 minutes...

1. "Hurt" by Johnny Cash (originally by Nine Inch Nails)
Yasamin and I have already had discussions about this song, but this is seriously one of the best covers ever. I love the original NIN version and somehow this stripped down version (and the accompanying music video) by Cash is even more depressing and just makes you want to slit your wrist and put an end to this miserable existence...just so hauntingly depressing and beautiful...

2. "Down With the Sickness" by Richard Cheese (originally by Disturbed)
I didn't like this Disturbed song...but then I heard the Cheese version in the "Dawn of the Dead" remake and thought it was just brilliant...the song alone and the use of it in the flick...then I used it in the alternate cut of my first short 'film' for a filmmaking class I took a couple years ago...

3. "Devil Woman" by Cradle of Filth (originally by Cliff Richards)
I love CoF...and it's interesting that they took this (goth) folk song by 70's Brit folk troubadour Cliff Richards and made it completely their own. I love how they always choose random songs to do covers of...like Heaven 17's "Temptation," Sister of Mercy's "No Time to Cry," or Shakespeare's Sisters's "Stay"...the riff on "Devil Woman" is just monstrous AND King Diamond does guest chorus vocals and banshee wails...you just can't go wrong with King...

4. "Gypsy" by Emperor (originally by Mercyful Fate)
This is one of my favorite MF songs from their "Don't Break the Oath" album and Emperor stays faithful to the original while leaving their own stamp on it. The make the main riff more driving and less galloping (if that makes any sense) and Ihsahn's vocals can reach all the vocal ranges that King Diamond can (although NO ONE does it better or quite like King) but doesn't try to blatantly copy King...Emperor also added their own synth whooshes and symphonic elements...the song (from the "In the Nightside Eclipse" album) was recorded in the Grieg Memorial Hall which was probably a contributing factor to the track's 'epic' sound...

5. "Eleanor Rigby" by gODHEAD (originally by The Beatles)
gODHEAD has actually covered this song twice. Once on an indie label release and rerecorded it under Marilyn Manson's direction when they were picked up by Manson's short-lived Posthuman Records. It's an interesting cover and both versions have their own good, unique qualities. They always play the Manson-ized version live...probably because that's the version that most people know... Mike Miller's guitar work on this song live far exceeds both recorded versions of this track...

6. "Wandering Star" by Kid Beyond (originally by Portishead)
Dude, look this guy up on YouTube or go to KidBeyond.com. Kid is a beatboxer/vocalist/one-man band...if you ever get a chance to see him live, go for it. He does some kick-ass live-looping and this is going to sound sorta wrong, but the sound that comes from that man's body is just, well, beyond anything you'll ever most likely experience...just amazing...

7. "Enjoy the Silence" by Lacuna Coil (originally by Depeche Mode)
I'm not a big Depeche fan and it seems like whene other people cover their stuff, it actually sounds good...well, DM isn't HORRIBLE, but, um, yeah... Lacuna makes the track sound more, um, industrial-ish...heavy guitars, other-worldly synth work...but what makes this special is that Lacuna has two MCs, one male and one female vocalist, and I love Cristina's vox in general, but her voice just so amazing on this track...sounds great live, too

8. "I Put a Spell on You" by Marilyn Manson (originally by Screamin' Jay Hawkins)
This was supposed to be the first single off of "Smells Like Children" but got replaced by "Sweet Dreams" which was a remarkable cover since Manson completely reinvented the song and gave it new life...and it's an excellent cover, but it's so damn over-played...it's like every Manson show you go to, you are guaranteed to hear this fucking song...ugh...but his version of "I Put a Spell on You" is just gritty, dirty, and sleazy...me likey...

9. "Suicide is Painless" by Marilyn Manson (the M*A*S*H theme song!)
I sorta did a double take when I found out Manson was covering this song. It's just a weird mix...Manson and M*A*S*H...eh? The lyrics to this song are actually very dark and depressing and the music sounds sad as well, but the music is also sort of relaxed and airy...and in the movie it's the guy with the guitar singing it like it was some kind of fucked up campfire song... Manson's version is very minimalist...just vox, a keyboard, and some backgroudn ambience...and there's something about just vocals and a keyboard that, when done well, can be so full of despair and, not unlike "Hurt," just makes you want to slit your wrist because life just ain't gonna get any better...

10. "Stripped" by Rammstein (originally by Depeche Mode)
Yet another DM song on the list...I really like Rammstein's version and Charlie Clouser's "Heavy Mental Mix" remix of Rammstein's version was one of the best remixes I've ever heard. But seriously, one of the best covers ever done...the video was kind of, uh, weird though...

TASAI #3 Answers

2006-11-21T15:35:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Eighth Lock" by GWAR

It looks like the almighty Squiggle is this week's winner with a score of 6 out of 10...although there really is no prize, other than that warm and squishy feeling you get knowing that you kicked all ass...

Sorry this is coming so late in the day...the computers in my immediate working area were out of commission for a while due to some electrical problems...

1. In "Die Hard," when Sgt. Al Powell (the cop played by Reginald VelJohnson) is at the am/pm and looks up at the Nakatomi Tower, what is the cost of Regular gasoline?
A. $0.74 9/10
Yup, almost $0.75 back in the late 80's. Last time I paid for gas (4 days ago) I paid $2.41 per gallon. I have a picture from 2001 of my (now ex-)girlfriend flipping me off (because I told her to...not because she was mad at me...all that came later in the relationship) and you can see a gas station price sign in the background...and the regular stuff was only something like $1.15 or $1.17 back then...so sad...

2. The term vibrissae is the scientific name for:
B. The whiskers of a feline
I'm glad answer A got one guess...mucus membrane of a goat...hehehe...

3. What was the middle name of Dharma Montgomery (Jenna Elfman) on TV's "Dharma & Greg"?
A. Freedom

4. The African nation of Mali was once known as:
C. French Sudan

5. Despite there being 10 "Friday the 13th" films (11 if you count "Freddy vs. Jason"), which sequel is titled "The Final Chapter"?
A. Part IV
Part VI was also known as "Jason Lives" and Part VIII was one of my personal favorites...the ever ridiculous, ever retarded, whythafuckdidtheydothat? schlock disasterpiece "Jason Takes Manhattan" (which was notable because it was Kelly Hu's big screen debut as the nerdy Eva Watanabe...who is peer-pressured into doing coke by one of the slutty chicks in the movie...so she dies...although I just like the film because it's stupid and Kane Hodder's in it)...

6. Bea Arthur's real name is:
B. Bernice Frankel

7. What is the subtitle of the Marvin Gaye song "Mercy Mercy Me"?
B. The Ecology
I wish the Bacon & Sausage answer were true...

8. What is Bart Simpson's middle name?
A. Jo-Jo

9. What was the original name of the Baby Ruth candy bar?
C. Kandy Kake
Sorry it wasn't anything exciting like Nut Crunch...and Sleuth's Bar was the name of the bar and grill in the setting of this fine waste of celluloid.

10. The masked crimefighting alter ego of Quick Draw McGraw is:
B. El Kabong

Take A Stab At It #3

2006-11-20T00:32:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Nothin' But a Good Time" by Poison

I think I'm most proud of question number one for this installment...

1. In "Die Hard," when Sgt. Al Powell (the cop played by Reginald VelJohnson) is at the am/pm and looks up at the Nakatomi Tower, what is the cost of Regular gasoline?
A. $0.74 9/10
B. $0.91 9/10
C. $1.02 9/10

2. The term vibrissae is the scientific name for:
A. The mucus membrane of a goat
B. The whiskers of a feline
C. The toes of a sloth

3. What was the middle name of Dharma Montgomery (Jenna Elfman) on TV's "Dharma & Greg"?
A. Freedom
B. Karma
C. Petal

4. The African nation of Mali was once known as:
A. French Ghana
B. French Somaliland
C. French Sudan

5. Despite there being 10 "Friday the 13th" films (11 if you count "Freddy vs. Jason"), which sequel is titled "The Final Chapter"?
A. Part IV
B. Part VI
C. Part VIII

6. Bea Arthur's real name is:
A. Elizabeth Barrett Browning
B. Bernice Frankel
C. Brett Francis

7. What is the subtitle of the Marvin Gaye song "Mercy Mercy Me"?
A. Bacon & Sausage
B. The Ecology
C. Heart of Glass

8. What is Bart Simpson's middle name?
A. Jo-Jo
B. Marion
C. Francis

9. What was the original name of the Baby Ruth candy bar?
A. Sleuth's Bar
B. Nut Crunch
C. Kandy Kake

10. The masked crimefighting alter ego of Quick Draw McGraw is:
A. Señor Fisticuffs
B. El Kabong
C. The Kingfish

Answers tomorrow!!!

TASAI #2 Answers

2006-11-17T11:10:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Väkirauta" by Korpiklaani

And it looks like Yasamin has once again captured the high score of installment #2 of TASAI with 6 out of 10 correct!

Here are the answers:
1. The theme song to the show "M*A*S*H" is titled:
B. "Suicide is Painless"
Marilyn Manson did an excellent cover of this song for the “The Blair Witch 2: Book of Shadows” soundtrack…I don’t think it actually appeared in the flick…which sucked huge donkey dick by the way…

2. In "Superman IV: The Quest for Peace," the foe of the title character was:
A. Nuclear Man

3. A 'myriad' refers to the number:
A. 10,000
Y’know, I thought it would be more than that…

4. The vacuum cleaner that cleans up after the Teletubbies is named:
A. Noo Noo
I am expecting some kind of remark from one of you on this, but I’ve never seen the Teletubbies…I mean, I know who they are, but have never seen the show…this was a random find…I’ll have another really random question on Monday’s installment!

5. L. Frank Baum's first novel was:
A. Father Goose

6. What was the original name of "Nova" magazine?
B. Omni

7. Who said "I need sex like I need food"?
A. Barbra Streisand
Does anyone remember that episode of “South Park” that they presented in like Spooky Vision (or was it Scary Vision?) or some shite like that? They had the little Barbra Streisand heads in the corners of the TV screen…scary…

8. What was the catch phrase for the cartoon frog in TV commercials for Kellogg's Sugar Smacks?
C. "Dig 'em"
I just love that there was a cereal called “Smacks”…do they still make it? Probably no…

9. The average length (in inches) of an erect penis according to American men is:
C. 10
Yup, American men are reporting some rather high numbers when it comes to the size of their trouser snakes…

10. ...and the average length according to women?
A. 4
…but the womenfolk are reporting that it’s more like a trouser larva…

Take A Stab At It #2

2006-11-16T15:12:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Field in Flames" by Korpiklaani

TASAI's first installment's high scorers were Yasamin and Samurai Frog with 6 out of 10 each...nothing against Frog, but I think Yasamin should get extra credit for that taint comment...and beef curtains...that's some good shite... I think I'm going to try to post the answers the next day from here on out...I sort of feel like no one's gonna give a shit if they have to wait a couple days between the question and the answer...

TASAI #1 Answers:

1. "Avocado" actually comes from a Nahuatl word meaning:
C. Testicle
Think about that the next time you eat guacamole!

2. Esperanto has how many irregular verbs?
A. 0
And no, I know neither what Esperanto is nor what irregular verbs are...

3. Axilla is the medical term for what body part?
C. The armpit

4. The number 138,435 can represent:
A. The length of a marathon in feet
The typical quantity of quills on a porcupine is 36,000 and the weight of the Washington Monument in tons is 90,854

5. What was the original name of the Peach colored Crayola crayon
before it was changed in 1962?
C. Flesh
I made up the other two colors...I don't know if they actually officially exist in the Crayola world...

6. What did the color Prussian Blue become when Crayola changed its
name in 1958?
A. Midnight Blue
Those other two shades of blue are actual Crayola colors...

7. How often does the title character in "Dumbo" speak?
C. Never

8. The sitcom "Just Shoot Me" involved people working at what fashion
magazine?
B. Blush

9. The name Darwish refers to:
B. The last name of pop singer Tiffany
I was kinda hoping somebody would've guessed the seaQuest dolphin (whose name is Darwin)...alas...

10. A log-rolling tournament is known as a:
A. Roleo
Yup, a roleo...I'm just as surprised as you...doesn't seem like it would be a real word...but then again, loggery wasn't a real word...I made that one up completely...but it sounded good, ja? I tried to look it up on dictionary.com and found nothing...then I looked it up on urbandictionary.com which got one search result for the term 'vagina logger' which apparently means "Someone who likes to bang pussy"... ... ...

OK, so here's the new set of questions!

1. The theme song to the show "M*A*S*H" is titled:
A. "Over Hill, Over Dale, Our Love Will Never Fail"
B. "Suicide is Painless"
C. The Swamp"

2. In "Superman IV: The Quest for Peace," the foe of the title character was:
A. Nuclear Man
B. Lex Luther
C. Radioactive Man

3. A 'myriad' refers to the number:
A. 10,000
B. 100,000
C. 1,000,000

4. The vacuum cleaner that cleans up after the Teletubbies is named:
A. Noo Noo
B. Boo Boo
C. Whathafuck?!?

5. L. Frank Baum's first novel was:
A. Father Goose
B. The Mystery of Bonita
C. By the Candelabra's Glare

6. What was the original name of "Nova" magazine?
A. Quasar
B. Omni
C. Starlight

7. Who said "I need sex like I need food"?
A. Barbra Streisand
B. Truman Capote
C. Woody Allen

8. What was the catch phrase for the cartoon frog in TV commercials for Kellogg's Sugar Smacks?
A. "Crunch 'em"
B. "Smack 'em"
C. "Dig 'em"

9. The average length (in inches) of an erect penis according to American men is:
A. 7
B. 9
C. 10

10. ...and the average length according to women?
A. 4
B. 7
C. 9

Answers tomorrow!

CC!

2006-11-14T11:31:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Under Huntress Moon" by Cradle of Filth

This is my 200th post!

So for no reason whatsoever other than that 200 = CC in Roman numerals, this post is dedicated to C.C. Deville from Poison!

Open this link in a new window so you can listen to a midi of "Fallen Angel" while looking at this post!!! Oh holy bejeezus!!!

Cecil Cornelius DeVille was born as Bruce Anthony Johannesson in Brooklyn, New York on May 14, 1962. He moved to Los Angeles in 1981 and played in various bands before joining Poison...and uh, had his hand in writing hit songs that went on to sell millions of records but was out of the band for a looooooong time because the dude likes the drink and the 'magic powder' if you know what I mean...blah blah blah, OK, here are more pictures:

"All right! I won't go within 50 feet of your blow! Just don't, um, hit me, with your, uh, big skull guitar..."

I don't really want to know what the "OR" involves...

Um, ewww... C.C. Deville sporting a homeless chic look... Gee...I'm not sure why but this pic reminded me of this exact picture of David Lee Roth:

The man has seen better days...oh, how the mighty have fallen...

Take A Stab At It #1

2006-11-13T13:18:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Enslaved and Condemned" by Old Man's Child

OK, I'm really going to need feedback on this one. I was trying to come up with a new approach to the trivia and came up with "Take A Stab At It"...and quite honestly I'm already missing "Trivia for Squiggle"...it had a nicer ring to it...

So in this second era of useless facts I'm going to ask 10 questions per installment and you can all answer in the comments section. I can already see how this might be a problem in that you can all look up the answers online or whatever before posting responses...so I suppose I'm hoping you'll all just take a stab at the questions without (well, it's not necessarily, but I'll still call it) 'cheating'...hehe...

If I go this route, I suppose I'll shoot for two installments per week...maybe once on Monday and again on Thursday with the answers to the old questions at the bottom of the new post...of course, this idea might totally suck and we'll just end up seeing "TFS: Era II" in no time... Even though it takes a little longer to do, I had fun writing the questions for "TASAI #1"...it's either this or I could post five trivia bits along with every normal post I do (so there's always useless bits of random info and it'll get you all to read my posts!...)...or I could just go back to posting 25 questions per week in one long post... I'll let the people decide...you're the ones who have to look at this crap...

OK, so here goes...feel free to be brutally honest with your feedback...!

1. "Avocado" actually comes from a Nahuatl word meaning:
A. Jewel
B. Rock
C. Testicle

2. Esperanto has how many irregular verbs?
A. 0
B. 6
C. 13

3. Axilla is the medical term for what body part?
A. The lower jaw
B. The area between the genitals and the anus
C. The armpit

4. The number 138,435 can represent:
A. The length of a marathon in feet
B. The typical quantity of quills on a porcupine
C. The weight of the Washington Monument in tons

5. What was the original name of the Peach colored Crayola crayon
before it was changed in 1962?
A. Light Orange
B. Yellow Pink
C. Flesh

6. What did the color Prussian Blue become when Crayola changed its
name in 1958?
A. Midnight Blue
B. Cadet Blue
C. Denim

7. How often does the title character in "Dumbo" speak?
A. Once
B. Twice
C. Never

8. The sitcom "Just Shoot Me" involved people working at what fashion
magazine?
A. Flirt
B. Blush
C. Bull's Eye

9. The name Darwish refers to:
A. The talking dolphin on "seaQuest DSV"
B. The last name of pop singer Tiffany
C. The wharf where the Boston Tea Party was held

10. A log-rolling tournament is known as a:
A. Roleo
B. Loggery
C. Turnabout

Sacrelicious...?

2006-11-12T23:30:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "God of Wind" by Korpiklanni

Check out this new candy...it's a marshmallow lollipop that's made to look like you're toasting a marshmallow...apparently the stick part of it FEELS LIKE A REAL STICK!!!

The idea of a marshmallow lollipop kinda disgusts me...it would be WAY too sweet and that thar's a helluvalotta sugar...but there's something interesting and creative about the idea/packaging/execution of it all that it kinda makes me want to buy it...

Now what does this have to do with the headline you ask? Well, I began to think about what other well-known things on sticks you could make a marshmallow pop out of...? I'm sure you already know where I'm going with this and I'm so going to Hell just for thinking of it, but...crucifixion pop anyone? There I said it...but to redeem myself, you could also do a witch trial version...
"What do you do with witches?"
"BURN THEM!"
"And what do you burn apart from witches?"
"MORE WITCHES!"

This all reminds me of one of the more offensive pictures I've seen on the internet...probably shouldn't open this one at work. I'm sure you've all seen something worse (I know I have!), but this, to me, was really bad...

I'm hoping to have the trivia up in an all new format later on today!

Soundtrack, Vol. 1 - The Road Trip

2006-11-07T16:32:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "American Witch" by Rob Zombie

So here's a new 'feature' I'm trying out here on the blog...I'm still planning on bringing the trivia back, thanks for your patience!... Every two weeks each Tuesday (because that's when CDs come out! hehe...), starting today, I'm going to come up with a theme to create a soundtrack to...like "Songs for a Rainy Day" or "Songs to Slit Your Wrist By"
or "Songs to March Through Hell With"...I kinda dig that last idea...hmmm...but you get the picture. I'll come up with my list of songs and hopefully you'll come up with yours...please leave them in the comments section of this post.

A few guidelines: there really are no rules, but I figured I'd give this experiment some sort of structure...to keep it simple, come up with a list of ten songs. That seemed like the most reasonable number to me. I know you could fit more than ten 'standard length' songs onto a recordable CD, but, um, yeah...and be reasonable in not choosing like ten concertos or symphonies that are 20 minutes in length each...try to make it not go over 80 minutes...

For the first installment, I chose the easiest possible theme I could think of: a road trip compilation...

For me, especially since I haven't done a road trip alone yet, I find that I have to play a mix of stuff that would please not just myself, but the passengers in my car. With my friends, Rammstein is generally a rather safe choice...and we also like to listen to some country-ish type shite (or classic rock, particularly Southern rock) for when you get to those 'middle of nowhere' stretches of road...but I didn't want to make a CD that was just half Rammstein and half, say, Johnny Cash...so I mixed it up a little...

Now, if this were a stoned road trip, substitute all the non-industrial tracks with any random mix of Slim Whitman songs and replace all the rock tracks with covers Rammstein has done or any of their good remixes...or TATU songs (but only in their native tongue...not the shitty English versions)...in this particular case, I would try to make the 'rock' stuff as reasonably Euro-trashy as possible...

1. "The Gift" by Godhead
There are so many Godhead tracks I could've chosen to start off my disc, but I went with this one because it's got a great riffs and I love The Method's programming...it stands out, but it's subtle...doesn't overpower the song. A great starter that I think most people (who like the rock) would be able to enjoy...

2. "Rock 'N Me" by Steve Miller Band
A classic rock tune about going places!...how fitting...and I love this song...rockin' music and Steve Miller has a great voice...The Dave Brockie Experience (the guys in GWAR sans the costumes) would always tag on a cover of this after they played the X-Cops's "You Fucked Up"...

3. "Mann Gegan Mann" by Rammstein
One of many Rammstein songs with a sort of double meaning...you can either take it as a man against man battle...or a man against man sausage fest...but the chorus and the interlude-type-thing in the middle of the song are some of the most driving (no pun intended) riffs they've ever composed...

4. "The Man Comes Around" by Johnny Cash
Now, who doesn't like Johnny Cash? At this point in the trip (considering the times I leave for road trips), I should be flying down the 101...heading towards Ventura County...still the city, but I'm vastly approaching the road through nowhere...might as well start the country/Southern stuff...and would choose the demo version of this song opposed to the album cut...

5. "Sturm" by Front Line Assembly
My favorite FLA song...kinda makes me wish the Twisted Metal tournament actually existed so I could kill people whilst listneing to it...creepy, dark, industrial...yummy...

6. "It Takes People Like You (to Make People Like Me)" by Buck Owens
I love Buck Owens...and this is one of his lighter/fluffier tunes...figured I needed something to bring me back to reality after Front Line Assembly...

7. "Das Modell" by Rammstein
A cover of a Kraftwerk tune...this is about as Euro-trashy as this particular compilation gets. Again, and no pun intended, but the riff is very fast and very driving...it's one of those songs you could drive 90mph to...

8. "Midnight Rider" by The Allman Brothers
Southern...fucking...rock...at it's finest. I don't even really feel I have to say anything else about this song...

9. "Decadent & Desperate" by Mortiis
Mortiis's music just gets me fucking AMPED...! That man's got so much energy and his music is like a sonic assault on your ears...just brutal...and awesome...one last screaming industrial track before our final offering:

10. "Free Bird" by Lynyrd Skynyrd
The epic. I always have a copy of this song on hand when I drive long distances because I generally pass by a smattering of cows at some point...and I insist on listening to something white-trashy when I see cows...somehow "Freebird" became that song...

The Score: Scott 1, Stupid Cartoon Dog 0

2006-11-06T16:33:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "(Nothing But) Flowers" by Talking Heads

...and the rest of Strawberryland shall follow suit...

I'd just like to state here at the beginning that I have no pictures of the account that is to follow...there was no time...it was a spur of the moment massacre...besides, if some retarded five year old were to see images of what transpired, I'm not ready to pay the therapy bill for it...

So we had this four foot tall Pupcake (one of Strawberry Shortcake's pets and the dumbest cartoon dog in existence) in our lobby at work. It was in the Rose Parade or something of that equivalence a few years ago...and seeing as how it was made mostly out of organic materials, it's been getting rather funky and today was the day they decided to chuck him... So I'm at my desk doing paperwork of some sort when I hear my name called from down the hall. I had no idea they were planning to get rid of it and when I found out the plan I knew my day had come.

I've been dreaming about punching the shit out of this thing since day one of working here. It sucks coming in every morning and leaving every day having that damn dog stare at me...mocking me... The guys throwing it out had it on rollers and were ready to get it the Hell out of the building that very minute...so I went with them and we took it down to our parking structure and mutilated the fucker. I got first crack at it and did indeed punch Pupcake in the eye...and I hit him hard...cut my hand, too, but I didn't care...must've been because of all that adrenaline and hatred flowing through me. What followed afterwards was, well, let me paint you a picture: four grown men with boots on with two of us packing blades (boxcutters, of course) trying to behead this steel-framed, coconut-crusted giant lawn ornament. We slit its throat area with our blades but also stomped the head in several times to try to get it to come off...but to no avail...the somewhat disembodied head was held on to the body by a steel rod spine...alas... We kicked his ass, though...

So I wound up with a bloodied hand, my right ankle hurts from the football-like punt I attempted while two other guys held Pupcake in place, and the pants I just washed are filthy from all the foam dust and coconut bits (or rather, Pupcake's sweet sweet blood)...but it was so worth it...in all my nine months of working at DIC, that was THE highlight of all my time at this company and a memory I will treasure forever...

And while we weren't able to decapitate the mutt completely, we were able to break an ear off, which I kept as a trophy...and I've sort of affixed it in a cape-like way on the mannequin (her name is Angie) at my desk here at work...

Today was a good day...

Trip to the Music Store...

2006-11-05T18:04:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "The Portrait" by King Diamond

So I was at a used record shop this weekend and purchased four items...and not a single damn one of them is anything alike whatsoever. I like a lot of different shite, mainly metal (and nobody in this or any other dimension does it better than King Diamond), and if it sounds good or interesting to me, I'll listen to it. Here's what sounded good to me whilst killing time on a Saturday afternoon:

Find #1: "Clerks II" - Soundtrack to the Motion Picture
Kevin Smith is one of those directors who always puts together amazing soundtracks. Even if you don't like his movies, you'll probably like the soundtrack albums to his movies...there are also great audio clips from the movie on this one. I'll start by saying that there is not only one, but there are TWO King Diamond tracks on this collection...as well as an audio clip ("The First of the Fallen") that has Randal and Jay singing lines from the KD songs in the flick. There's also Q Lazzarus's "Goodbye, Horses"...which many of you many know as "The Silence of the Lambs song...it's an incredibly well-written song with a great meaning. Not only amazing for its genre, but just damn good period...I used to only have this as an mp3 that somebody gave me on a mixed CD and now that I hear it in its entirety with CD quality sound, I'm even more blown away by this track. To finish up, I'll say that another notable track known from another movie is "Raindrops Keep Fallin' on My Head" (from "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid")...you also get keen stuff from Samantha Fox, Soul Asylum...hell, even the Alanis Morrisette song is good!

Find #2: "Family Tree" - Bjork
A greatest hits/rarities/b-sides collection brought to you by Bjork...damn, she's hot...but I digress... I resisted buying this when it came out a couple years ago because the collection is five mini discs (four/five songs per disc) and one regular size CD...and it was expensive for what is really three CDs worth of material...and the regular size CD is just a 'greatest hits as chosen by Bjork' disc (which I basically already have because I own all her albums)...I even have quite a few of the rarities...so I didn't see any point in getting it when it was first released, also because this 'box set' is not any larger than a standard double CD case and carries a price tag of around $50 to $60 for a new copy...you can go to Amazon.com right now and buy it for $59.98! But at the used price of $12.99 for the whole set? Absofuckinglutely!

Find #3: "Stand Up and Shout: The Anthology" - Dio
I've seen Ronnie James Dio live in concert once and, though creepily elfin he may be, he can fucking rock harder than any new young band today. I dig everything about this collection, and upon seeing it I realized that I don't own any Dio albums!...so I kind of HAD to buy this... I think Dio's great, but with living in L.A. and listening to KLOS, you get to hear him a lot for free on the FM...so it's not like I'm lacking in his greatness...but the album artwork on this collection is killer and it has all the Elf/Rainbow/Black Sabbath/Dio essentials. I think this would probably be a good buy if you are lacking in the Dio department as well...

Find #4: "Anthology" - Franki Valli & The Four Seasons
This may surprise most people, but I DIG pop music from the 50's and 60's. It could be because this is what my parents listened to, so while I was growing up that was all I heard...well, that and opera... Back then people were, for the most part, doing music for the sake of the music...and there were no crazy digital effects or Pro Tools or the ability to fix complete fuck-ups in post...musicians ACTUALLY HAD TO BE TALENTED AND SOUND GOOD!...it's all so organic and soulful and brilliant...and ahhh, the wall of sound... Hearing this music always makes me happy...yet sad at the same time because I miss my childhood...

So, there ya go...a soundtrack with metal, new wave, Alanis Morissette, and audio clips about dark forces and donkey shows...the experimental/industrial/techno vox and beats of a sexy Icelandic chick...the man on the silver mountain...and 60's pop music ("Sherr-eeeeeeeeee...Sherry, baby..."...come on, you know you love it, too)...

Blessed Be Thy Name

2006-11-04T01:43:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Riddles" by Blessed Be Thy Name

I've really been digging a band called Blessed Be Thy Name as of late...I think they're from Arizona... They're kind of a goth industrial metal feral beast...or as they describe themselves, "the hymns of whores and heretics...the Devil's lonely tear. The hammer and the nail. The miscarriage Mother Mary had before her only son..."...come on, now how can you go wrong with that? It's evil, killer sound (kinda makes me want to have sex...no, it doesn't make me horny...it would just be interesting to have sex to), and the band's got a great image...and they're just plain fucking weird. Me likey the freaky... Eddie (the vocalist) is a trip...one guy at my office said he wanted "to be Eddie...for Halloween and forever!" Here's an image of BBTN's lead demon:

hehehe...

Check out blessedbethyname.com or myspace.com/blessedbethyname

Well, what the Hell else are you supposed to do with it?

2006-11-02T21:02:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "Living Among the Remains of Dead People" by Vond

I don't really understand the phrase "He/she wants to have his/her cake and eat it, too!" Well, what the Hell else are you supposed to do when you have cake? Are we just supposed to pass it around and let everyone hold it so we can all marvel at the glory and wonder that is baked goods? Would it be so greedy and wrong for one to eat a piece of cake that is in one's possesion? I know it's all metaphorical, but still...that's dumb...

The Gift

2006-11-01T19:07:00.000-08:00

Currently listening to: "The Endless Ocean" by Rabid Panda

I spent the majority of my day yesterday (11/1) away from my desk, but when I went to go check to see if I got any emails that needed to be tended to I found this on my desk:

Click on the image to enlarge...I tried to upload two other pictures with more close up details, but it was a pain in the ass just getting this one up...I saw a lot of 'This page cannot be displayed'...ANYWAYS, for those of you who know me, you know that my ONE weakness is anything having to do with eyeballs. I've seen some rather disgusting shite in my lifetime (real and fake) and I can handle virtually any gory scene a horror movie throws at me, but if it involves eyeballs in any way (popping out, getting stabbed, etc) I just can't take it and I have to turn away...it's all because of that 'flyball' scene in Evil Dead 2 that scarred me at a younger age.

So when I saw this eyeball bowl (it's ceramic, has eyeballs on the sides and has one ceramic eye attached on the inside of the bowl) with chocolate eyeball candies, I damn near had a fit in the office. Many people in the office know of my occular sphere aversion, so I thought this was some joke but I was not cool with it. I asked the other assistant who sits across from me "Who the Hell put this on my desk!?" and she said it was our boss...so damn it, I can't get mad at my boss...especially because the boss I have now is probably the best boss I've ever had...and she wasn't around at the time so I just went back to doing what I was doing in another part of the building. When I talked to her later and thanked her for the gift she told me that she didn't know about my, uh, 'problem' and had just found out about it after getting the bowl...she had bought one for the other assistant, too, by the way. My boss figured that with all the creepy stuff I'm in to, I would probably enjoy something like an eyeball bowl...so as it turns out it was a very thoughtful gift and she thinks it's funny as all Hell that I'm such a pussy when it comes to eyeballs - she didn't actually call me a pussy, but you know what I mean, ja? It's nice when you have a cool boss...